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I shrugged and wiped my eyes. “I know you want me to get a degree. Get a successful job, and all that.”
Mom laughed. “Well, not everyone can do what your father does. I know I couldn’t.” We both shared a chuckle. “You know I support you. Dad supports you. No matter.”
After that, we finally ate, though I could barely stomach the food after our talk. The lemonade was great, though. We talked about Mom’s newest design project and then we figured out the details of my withdrawal from community college. The air was lighter, and I could breathe again. I felt a text go off in my pocket, but I ignored it as we talked. I knew it was more than likely Ash. I couldn’t wait to tell him how well things had gone—with Mom, at least.
Right as I gathered the plates in preparation to take them to the kitchen, Mom lightly grabbed my wrist.
“Is there anything else you want to talk about,mijo?” Mom asked softly. Something in her neutral expression told me she knew. About me. And Ash. What our relationship had evolved into. My heart picked up so fast, that I could feel the lemonade tickle the back of my throat as another wave of nausea rolled through me.
“W-what?”
“You can tell me. I don’t expect you to tell me everything.” She smiled gently. “I know you’re grown. But…I feel like you need to tell me something else?”
Oh, God. I really wasn’t expecting that.
“Ash?” I questioned weakly. Why was Mom so good at knowing these things? Were all mothers like this, or was she especially gifted?
She gave me a curt nod.
“How do you know?” I whispered. “Whatdo you know?”
I rubbed my fingertips over the phone in my pocket, desperate to run away from the conversation and call Ash.
Mom shrugged. “You know I try to give you boys privacy. Truly.” She paused and took a breath. “But, uh, there was one night I went down to the basement to check in on you. It was late, and I wondered why you weren’t in bed. “You were both asleep on the couch, but Ash was laying on you. Your hands were—”
“Okay, okay. I get it.”I held up a hand to her and prayed she’d stop talking. I gulped and resisted the urge to run. Mom pursed her lips together and allowed me time to answer. “I—I don’t know, Mom. Something just…happened between us. Not that long ago. Not before he moved in or anything.” My voice cracked and my cheeks flooded with a violent blush. “Did you tell Dad?”
She shook her head. “No. That’s not my place.”
“Are you…shocked?”
Mom shook her head again. “No.Not shocked. With Emma, you never seemed like yourself. Something was missing.”
“I don’t know if I’m gay, or bisexual, or…” I trailed off and brushed away a couple of tears.
Mom got up and wrapped her arms around me as I sat there in my chair. She kissed my temple and moved the hair from my eyes. “Drew, it doesn’t matter. You don’t have to label your relationship with Ash.” A sob I didn’t know I was forcing down broke out. Mom ran her hands over my shoulders as she continued. “You don’t have to label your sexuality, either. Everyone is different.” She moved her head so I could turn to face her, then tipped my chin up so I was looking at her. “You are perfect. Just as Drew. Okay? Just be safe about it all.”
Another sob burst from my chest as she held me once more.
“Estoy orgullosa de tenerte como mi hijo.” I am proud to have you as my son.
Her words made me cry harder, but she stayed there with her arms around me, brushing her fingers through my hair and telling me how good I was. Finally, when all the tears were gone, after my breathing steadied, I stood up and gave her a proper hug.
“I’ll tell your father about school. You tell him about the band. The rest—you tell him when you’re ready.”
I latched on to my mother again and let her absorb all my worries and fears in the special way only a parent can before we finally moved into the kitchen to clean.
As we cleaned the dishes, she asked, “So, what is the band name?”
There was a heavy blanket of exhaustion draped over my body after our emotional dinner, but I smiled at the plate I was scrubbing, happy that she asked. “April Renegade.”
Mom smirked. “Why April?”
I shook my head and hid a grin. There were some things that were only for myself and Ash to share.
