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ChapterTwo
~Lexi~
Leo knewme better than anyone, and I could see it in his eyes that he was worried about me.But he’d be even more worried if I’d asked him to pick up the pregnancy test.I couldn’t put that stress on him right now.Not when I could see how he was struggling already.
No.He didn’t need to know.Not until there was something to know.
Fortunately for me, Enid Lawson, one of my closest friends, and the owner of the general store, didn’t even raise an eyebrow when she scanned my purchases.She knew my struggle, and she knew me well enough to know that if I wanted to talk about it, I would.
Enid and I have been friends for years, and besides Nicole, she was definitely my best friend, maybe even more so because I saw her more these days because Nicole and Ryan lived in the city.We saw them quite a bit when they were first married and Leo moved up to Canada.But...life happens, people got busy and now that they were expecting their first child, it was even harder.More than hard.I wanted nothing more than to give Leo another child and Ben a brother or sister.I did my best to be a supportive best friend and listen to all of Nicole’s experiences, but I’d be lying if I said it hadn’t stung a little every time she texted me a picture of her growing belly.
But more and more, it didn’t look like it was going to happen.Except...I sat in the car outside the house and clutched the box that held the stick that would tell my future.I turned it around in my hands and clutched it to my chest briefly before stuffing it into my purse.I grabbed up the rest of the bags and made my way up to the house.If Ben wasn’t in his room working on his homework, there’d be hell to pay.
Leo was always telling me to relax a little and give him some more space, but as a mother, that was almost impossible to do.Besides, I was trying.I really was.I’m not stupid, and I remember well what it was like to be a pre-teen and then, even worse, a teenager.
No.I knew the key to parenting was to give him just enough support to let him know I was there for him no matter what.And trust.Sure, he’d make mistakes, but I needed to trust him.
I took a deep breath before I went inside.It was hard, but I would try.
The second I saw Ben’s running shoes in a pile beside the closet—instead of in it—I exhaled hard.He was home.
Skip, Ben’s dog, ran over to greet me, happily licking my hand as I tried to pet him.
“He’s home, is he, Skip?”
The dog looked at me, barked once and took off running.No doubt to warn Ben I was home.“Traitor,” I called after him.“Remember who buys your food.”There was nothing to do but shake my head and deposit my groceries in the kitchen.Skip really was a good dog.A very early gift to Ben from Leo and named after skipping rocks.A skill Uncle Ray had tried to teach Ben right before he passed.He was definitely a special dog.In so many ways.And he was very loyal to Ben, a detail that made me both shake my head and smile.
A few minutes later, Ben wandered into the kitchen, his head down and looking at his feet that he shuffled along the hardwood in the way that made me crazy.“Hey, Mom.”
“Ben.”I tried to play it cool.I had to.If I got mad right away, he’d get defensive and any chance I might have of talking to him about whatever was really going on with him would be gone.No.I needed to try a softer approach.“I missed you after school.Did you walk home with your friends?”
“Nah.”He shuffled to the fridge and grabbed the jug of orange juice.
“You walked by yourself?”It wasn’t the answer I expected and I tried not to let him see that it took me off guard.“Maybe tomorrow we can walk together?I’ll leave the car at home and—”
“Maybe.”He poured himself a big glass of juice, and I tried to bite my tongue.
“Juice is for breakfast, buddy.We’re going to have dinner soon.Your father should be—” I stopped talking when I noticed his face.“Ben?What’s going on?Are you okay?”
He nodded but wouldn’t look at me.
“You know, if you want to talk about it...”
For a second, I didn’t think he’d say anything, but then a single tear rolled down his cheek.He swiped it away quickly, but I’d already seen it.I smiled as encouragingly as I could and that’s all it took for him to talk.“All the kids hate me.”
His words took the air from my lungs.I fought to maintain composure.“What are you talking about?”I pulled the carton of milk from the shopping bag and did my best to look casual as I put the groceries away, but all I really wanted to do was wrap my arms around my little boy, hug him tight and protect him from the hurts of the world.“That can’t be true.”
“It is.They make fun of me and steal my lunches.”
“Your lunches?”
Ben nodded and sank onto the barstool across from me.
“What do you mean, they make fun of you?”I dreaded the answer, but I had to know.I couldn’t not ask.
He dropped his head to the countertop and mumbled something into his arms.
“What was that?”
