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ChapterEight
~Lexi~
Thinkingabout Leo and the baby and the hotel and pretty much everything that had happened in the last forty-eight hours was making me crazy.I couldn’t sit still.I couldn’t eat.I couldn’t do anything.I’d excused myself from Roxanne, and made up some lame excuse about my stomach being unsettled as to why I wasn’t joining everyone for breakfast.It was partially true.Itwasunsettled.Hell, all of me was unsettled.
I’d asked Roxanne to tell Leo I’d gone to lie down, and I’d see him after breakfast.It was absolutely the chicken thing to do.And I knew it.But when I saw him with Ben, talking on the beach after they got in from the paddle boards, my heart just broke a little bit.If Leo was considering moving to Vegas and leaving us behind, Ben would be without a father.
Again.
I’d done that to him once with Andrew, the only father he’d known when he was a little boy.
But that was different.Leowashis father.He wouldn’t leave Ben.He wouldn’t leave me.
Would he?
No.I knew in my heart he wouldn’t leave.I was just being hormonal or overtired, or oversensitive, or over something.
What I really needed to do was talk to Leo.I needed to figure out what the real story was with Oasis and everything else.Part of me had been waiting for him to come to me and tell me the truth about what Keith had asked of him.But with every minute that went by, it looked more and more as if that wasn’t going to happen.In fact, if what Roxanne said was true, Leo had already made his decisions about everything without talking to me.
No.
I couldn’t believe that.This was Leo I was talking about.MyLeo.He would never keep such a thing from me.
But you’re keeping a secret from him.
My stupid inner voice piped up again.I couldn’t listen to her—to myself.In search of a distraction, I crossed our suite—our extremely large and well-appointed suite—and opened the bathroom door.The room was so large it was almost as big as the living room of our house back home, and despite the marble floors and oversized tub with an even larger steam shower on the other side of the room, there was something cozy about the bathroom.I would have expected such a room to look ostentatious, or cold, but the color scheme of ivory with brown and gold flecks was almost cozy.And the fireplace, which seemed kind of out of place in the desert, created a sense of warmth that I desperately needed at that moment.
I turned the taps and filled the tub, letting the room fill with steam.There was an assortment of oils and bath salts on the counter.The hotel was well-stocked, despite the barebones staff.Roxanne had explained that Keith had brought in a few key people who would start hiring the rest of the staff and setting the operating procedures for the resort, so even though they weren’t officially open, the people they did have were already getting into the groove.And I definitely appreciated it.Especially the decadent bath products that Joanne, the woman who would be in charge of housekeeping, provided.Our little house in Canada didn’t have a big bathtub.Heck, it didn’t have a bathtub at all and it was definitely one of the luxuries I missed.
I chose a bottle of lavender oil and poured it under the water, watching the bubbles fill the tub before I shed my wet bathing suit and robe in the middle of the floor.I tried to avoid the mirror, the way I did more and more these days.Pregnancy was hard on a body.Multiple miscarriages were very hard.And it wasn’t just the extra padding and stretch marks that crossed my abdomen that bothered me.No.It was more than that.My hand cupped the fleshy skin there and rubbed small circles.
It was definitely more than just the physical changes.It was the betrayal of my body that bothered me the most.The fact that time after time it wouldn’t allow me to carry the babies we’d conceived out of love.There was no reason the doctors could find for the miscarriages.There was no reason I shouldn’t be able to have another baby.
But you might have one now.
That little voice chirped up again.I looked up, so that despite myself, I stared at my naked reflection in the large mirror.Instead of glancing away quickly, I let myself—no, Imademyself—take it all in and really look at myself for the first time in a long time.Finally, when I was done taking stock, I homed in on my stomach and the life that was contained there.
I did the math in my head.It had been just over thirteen weeks.The longest I’d carried a baby since Ben.It took a moment for the realization to hit me.Thirteen weeks.I looked up so I stared at my own eyes in the mirror.
“Thirteen weeks.”
Like the doctor said, that was out of the danger zone.There was a real chance this was going to happen.Arealchance.
Which meant I had to tell Leo.He’d be thrilled.
Will he?
My conversation with Roxanne ran through my head again.If Leo had already made his decision about staying in Vegas...no.I wasn’t going to think about that yet.Not until I talked to Leo.
And I wasn’t going to do that until after I had my bath.
I stepped into the water.A sigh escaped my lips as I sank down and let the water surround me.I giggled as I slipped deeper, and the bubbles covered me so I could barely see.I may have gone a little overboard with the bath oils.
I rested my head back against the cool marble and closed my eyes as a smile played on my lips at the knowledge that I was actually pregnant and for the first time since I’d taken the test—maybe even a little hopeful.
~Leo~
“Lexi?”
