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LILA
My choice?Did he really just say that? What the hell is Mason talking about? When has anything ever been my choice? The answer to that is never. So I have no clue what he’s spouting off about.
But it’s hard to concentrate with him sitting pressed up against me in the back of the car as we make our way home. I’ve somehow ended up sandwiched between Beau and Mason. I don’t really hate it, even if I should. I honestly think this is the closest Mason has gotten to me since I’ve been home.
I let myself lean into him a bit. His big, warm body makes me feel some level of comfort. Not that I would ever admit that to anyone. He's my guardian. Most days he doesn’t even care for the sight of me. That’s why I know what he told Beau was all a load of BS. Well, not completely.
I think he was just breaking down how dating worked. Making a point that I was old enough to date and could date who I wanted. He didn’t mean that I could really date him. Just that we were old enough to date whomever we wanted.
Which is still a bunch of bullshit. Because there is no way Mason would let me date anyone. He spent two years making donations and bribing both the staff and student body at school in order to keep me as far away as possible from the opposite sex. He looked like he wanted to choke the server for even talking to me. He really needs to let his own words soak in.
“So you have to be an adult to date?” Beau suddenly asks.
The hell? I thought we moved past this already. We finished our ice cream and then let Beau run around the park for a bit. Not for too long, though. It has gotten dark rather quickly. I’m still a bit surprised I haven’t gotten in trouble for going out, but that might come soon. I could see the anger written all over Mason’s face when he first arrived. But he made sure to mask it so Beau wouldn’t think anything was wrong.
“Yes,” Mason answers.
“Do all adults date?” He scrunches his little nose.
“Not if they’re married or in a relationship with someone else.”
“Do you date, Drix?” My whole body stiffens at Beau’s question, but I quickly make myself relax and try to pretend to not be interested in Mason’s answer.
“No,” he says simply. I don’t know what to make of that either. Truthfully, it is hard to imagine Mason dating in my head. He’s always so serious. It would be strange to see him with a woman. Even though I’m curious about how he would act, I pray that I never have to see it for myself. I’m not sure I would be able to handle that.
Thankfully, something else catches Beau’s attention, and he starts asking questions about other things. I really don’t want to hear about Mason’s dating life, but my interest is a bit peaked now. Why the hell wouldn’t he date? Then it hits me. I bet he only does one-night stands. That thought sours my mood.
“I need a word,” Mason says to me after we get back into the house. “After you’ve wrapped up for the night,” he adds quickly before I can protest. Dammit. I planned on using the excuse that I had to give Beau a bath and put him to bed. Mason nipped that right in the bud.
“All right,” I agree. I’m in trouble for sneaking out. I can’t help but wonder what my punishment will be. A weird thrill rushes through my body as my mind starts to conjure up all the ways he could possibly punish me. My mind is thinking about all the dirty books I’ve been sneakily reading over the years. They were passed around boarding school like contraband. There is no way that’s the kind of punishment Mason is speaking of. He’s a bit too straight-laced for that.
“Bath?” Beau asks.
“Yep.”
“Cool.” He rushes over to give Mason a hug. I watch as Mason’s eyes soften as he leans down to give Beau a hug. A spark of jealousy lights inside of me. He openly gives him affection. Something he’s never done with me. “You should shower too,” Beau tells him, making me laugh.
“What does that mean?” Mason chuckles.
“You smell like a girl, and not in a good way.” Beau makes a face. “You don’t smell it?” Beau leans in, taking a giant sniff of Mason. It hits me then what Beau means. Mason must smell like perfume.
“Come.” I offer my hand to Beau, wanting to get out of here and away from this conversation. Mason’s eyes lock with mine, but I quickly rip them away as more hurt starts to build inside of me.
I can feel Mason’s eyes on me as Beau and I head toward his bedroom. “Something wrong?” Beau asks. I’m either really bad at hiding my emotions or Beau is really good at reading people.
“How can anything be wrong? I’m back here with you.” I run my fingers through his short hair.
“I’ve missed you.” He wraps his arms around my middle, giving me a tight hug. I was a bit worried when I’d left Beau with Mason. That he might not get the affection he needed with how cold Mason could often be, but I was clearly wrong. He’s only cold toward me.
“I’ve missed you too.” I hug Beau back tightly.
“Are you going to leave and go away to college?” he asks as I turn on the tub to start his bath.
“I don’t know,” I answer honestly. I don’t want to go anywhere, but sometimes I wonder if this place might whittle away at me. My emotions are all over the place.
“I don’t want you to leave again.” He stares up at me with those big brown eyes.
“All right, let’s see how this summer goes,” I tell him. I won’t lie to him.
“You’re going to love it here. You’ll never want to leave. Drix is the best.” I can tell he already thinks me staying is a done deal. I only wish things were that simple. “You think that’s why Drix wants to talk to you? 'Cause he wants to make sure you’re going to stay.” He nods his head as if answering his own question.
I’m pretty sure that’s the last thing Mason wants to talk to me about.
