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Alice took a second to comprehend this then, eyes widening, “No, absolutely not! No! God, Poll, what a suggestion!”
“Guess you need to factor in how well-endowed Aaron is,” Polly mused, admiring her handiwork. “And how close he was standing at the time.”
Alice blushed fiercely. Polly, totally oblivious, continued, “All in all, I think that was most definitely a close call on a kiss.”
“If it wasn’t for Mum phoning—”
“That was probably for the best,” Polly replied briskly. “Neither of you are emotionally equipped yet to deal with a kiss, it’s too soon; the whole thing would likely have ended up a shit sandwich.”
“It has already!” Alice wailed. “I mean, he’s only sent me one text since then, saying when he’s settled in the job he’ll let me know what the next step is. And we could barely talk to each other afterwards. I just pretended I was exhausted from the panic attack and needed to go home. I’ve never seen him look so relieved to see an Uber. He shoved me in it and headed off in the other direction.”
Polly’s chin rested on her knee as she slicked the brush over each nail. “You need to step back and take a wider view of this. When did you last see Aaron awkward around a woman? Like never. He’s always in control. Now he’s not. In fact, it sounds like he’s floundering. That’s a good sign. But he needs more time to acclimatise.”
“Acclimatise to what? He’s known me for ages. There’s nothing to get used to.”
Polly shook her head. “Munchkin,” she said with the patience of a mother who’s just found their toddler grinding playdough into the carpet, “youdon’t have to get used to anything because you’ve been in love with him for years. This is all new and weird for Aaron. Suddenly he’s got all these disturbing feelings zapping around inside about someone he’s always thought of platonically. Besides, he’s crap at relationships. You are, in point of fact, his only true girlfriend.Right now, he probably feels like he’s swallowed glass shards.”
“Wow! That sounds enticing.”
“Feelings are messy. Shit-bags! Look what I’ve done.” Polly stared horrified at the slash of purple smeared across the edge of her pinkie toe. “All this love talk is making me lose focus.”
“Sorry,” Alice muttered, handing Polly the nail polish remover and a cotton bud.
Polly glanced up as she took it, her smile reassuring. “Don’t worry, you’re in the hands of thelurvvvexpert. We do need to get things back on track, though. You can’t afford to lose your mojo after all this prep.”
“Retreating feels so much safer.”
“Falling in love is never safe.” Polly sang the opening riff of “Love is a Battlefield” way off key, but then, Polly did everything with so much confidence she somehow got away with it. She was always the first up on stage at Shamrock karaoke nights and the last to leave to enthusiastic applause despite torturing everyone’s eardrums.
Alice couldn’t think of anything worse than performing on stage. Except, possibly, the performance she was trying to pull off with Aaron. She straightened her shoulders. Sitting on the edge of the bath wasn’t the most comfortable place for a counselling session.
By now Polly had finished the first coat and she extended her legs and flexed her feet. With the red foam toe separators in place, her feet had taken on Minnie Mouse proportions.
“You need to bombard him with the new you,” Polly mused. “Subtly.”
“Isn’t subtle bombardment an oxymoron?”
“Meaning?”
“A contradiction in terms.”
Polly smirked. “Probably. That’s the point though, isn’t it? Aaron has to want this new you like crazy without knowing why. You’ve got to erase the way he used to feel about you; scramble his synapses, force his brain to lay down new pathways.”
Alice frowned. Sometimes Polly’s fascination with brain physiology made her own brain feel like a waterlogged sponge.
“Stop blinding me with science. Just tell me how to go about it.”
Polly started on her second coat. The colour took on more depth and complexity.
“Okay, well first we need to engineer another meet-up. Very soon. Maybe this Friday at the Shamrock.”
Alice cringed. “That would look too obvious. It’s his last day at his old job. He’ll be out for goodbye drinks with his team.”
“Hmmm, you’re right. Maybe not the best time.” Polly screwed the top back tightly on Purple Haze and popped it in the box of polishes. “Didn’t you say Oliver was here for some book launch thing?”
Alice screwed up her face. “Yes, I think that’s what Aaron said.” To be honest it was hard to remember; the night had turned into a rollercoaster of highs and lows.
Polly grabbed her phone off the vanity and started to scroll through search engines.
