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Chapter 13
Fitz had spent the majority of the day going over the plans for the upcoming wedding. Guests would start arriving in the next few days; the staff was prepared for the influx in visitors, and Cook had taken on two more apprentices to ensure that there would be enough help in the kitchen to prepare the large meals each day.
Fitz had spared no expense when it came to the accommodations for the wedding guests and the décor for the wedding celebration. After taking care of his own finances for the last few years, he had more than enough to spend on such an occasion. And since he hoped that this would be the last time he’d ever be married, he reasoned that it should be a joyous occasion for all.
More than anything, he wanted Diana to be happy. After getting to spend time with her the last few days, he’d started to grow fonder of her. Even more after she had told her the true nature of her family’s financial situation and the past behind their near poverty. Fitz thought that Diana deserved to have a wonderful wedding after everything she’d done and sacrificed for her parents to make sure they were always well cared for and comfortable. He felt proud to be marrying a woman such as Diana and wanted her to see that he thought highly of her.
Sometimes Fitz’s feelings about past events would resurface. He still loved Marian very much and hoped that whoever had wanted her dead was long gone and wouldn’t bother his new family at all. There were still times when he had nightmares about her killer coming for him in the night or when he’d least expect it. But after three long years and having experienced nothing from her killer, he hoped with a surety that the event of losing his wife would remain in the past.
“I hope you don’t mind that I’m marrying again,” Fitz said softly to himself as he took a turn around the gardens for a moment. He was starting to feel anxious about the wedding and knew that in a few hours he’d be dining with Diana and her parents again. It had become the part of the day he most looked forward to because spending time with Diana had been enjoyable for him. But now he took a moment to speak to the spirit of his late wife, if she haunted the place she’d been murdered at.
“I will never stop loving you, Marian. But I hope you won’t blame me for marrying again. I want to have children one day, just like we always planned to. And I think I’m starting to really like Diana,” Fitz said aloud as he walked through the gardens at a leisurely pace.
“I think you would have really liked her,” Fitz continued. “She’s witty and humorous, just like you were. I can imagine the two of you plotting so many mischievous things together had you two been introduced as young ladies. I also want you to know that I think I’ll enjoy having her as my wife. She’s a beautiful young lady, and I don’t want to feel guilty about being attracted to her.”
Fitz fell into his deep thoughts then as he walked, thinking about his feelings towards Diana. He knew that it was not love that made him want her, but these feelings stemmed from a much deeper lust. He blamed his years without the touch of a woman for spurring his desires for her. She was an untouched woman, he knew from the inexperienced way she reacted to him. But there was a natural way in which she responded to him.
He felt the need to introduce her to so much that only happened between a man and a woman. He didn’t know how long after their wedding night these feelings would continue, but he assumed that at least his goal for having children would be made true.
Eventually, Fitz made his way into his home and readied for dinner. He tried to keep his thoughts of desire to a minimum so that it wouldn’t get in the way of enjoying the evening with the Caseys. He was finding Lord Casey to be a good conversationalist while Lady Casey was a sweet older woman that he was convinced couldn’t see the wrong in anyone. He reasoned that they would both be nice company in his manor. And once he and Diana started to have children, they would become very doting grandparents.
Knowing that he had some time left before he expected Diana and her parents to arrive, Fitz grabbed a novel from his study and went into the drawing room to read. It was his last resort when it came to taming his mind and clearing his thoughts.
He’d give his mind something else to concentrate on and lose himself within the pages of a gripping story. He was so engrossed that he hadn’t heard Mr Bingley come into the room to announce Diana’s arrival till his guests were walking towards him.
“Forgive me,” Fitz said as he stood and dipped his head towards Lord and Lady Casey. He quickly set his book aside, hoping they wouldn’t judge him for reading a novel instead of some form of non-fiction. “How are you this evening?”
“We are quite lovely,” Lady Casey said with a bright smile. “Diana went to the seamstress today to have her gown designed. She told me all about the details when she returned home this afternoon.”
“My word, how exciting. Are these details you plan to share with me this evening?” Fitz asked with a smirk. He’d come to enjoy teasing the older woman, who seemed to like the gesture.
“Come now, Your Grace. I’ve already told you I will not do such a thing,” Lady Casey replied as she moved her hand to cover her mouth.
“In that case, I shall ask no more on the subject,” Fitz said as he turned his gaze to Diana. She met his eyes as she came around her father to curtsey before him. He noticed that her smile didn’t quite reach her eyes, telling him that something was not quite right with her.
“Good evening, Miss Casey,” Fitz said with a dip of his head. “I hope you enjoyed your day.”
“I certainly did, Your Grace. I even walked to the village for a bit of exercise, enjoying the day fully,” she replied.
“I told her that it was rude not to use the vehicle that was graciously given for such a purpose,” Lord Casey spoke up, giving his daughter a pointed look.
“I believe I would agree with your father on this particular notion. I would rather think you were safe in a barouche than walking alone along open roads,” Fitz said as he turned his gaze on Diana. He watched as she straightened her posture and tilted her chin up in a very defiant way. Fitz couldn’t help smiling at the beautifully strong woman in front of him.
“I’m pleased to report that I made it to and back from the village with not even a scratch on my walking boots,” she said, looking straight into Fitz’s eyes as thought to challenge him to say something more on the matter. If it had been just the two of them, he would have continued. And thinking he’d enjoy some privacy with his intended, an idea came to him.
“Miss Casey, would you care to join me for a turn around the gardens before dinner? The moon is lovely this evening, and I think I could use a bit of exercise.”
Fitz watched as Diana raised an eyebrow at him before looking to her parents for their approval. Lord Casey nodded his approval as he settled down onto a settee with his wife and picked up the novel that Fitz had set aside.
“I think I shall read to my wife what dukes enjoy reading,” Lord Casey said with a chuckle. Fitz laughed because he thought Lord Casey was being rather clever and also because he knew the Earl could not read all that well. Fitz then turned to Diana and offered his arm to her. Once she placed her hand lightly on his arm, he led her from the drawing room to the main hallway before leading her out the back door and into the gardens.
“You were right when you said it was a beautiful night tonight,” Diana commented as they walked. Fitz looked down at her and saw how she had her head tilted back with her eyes on the full moon. She looked lovely in the moonlight, her dark eyes seeming to reflect the light. He suddenly wondered what she would look like fully bare to him under such light, forcing him to suddenly look away from her in order to put a stop to his rising desire for her.
“What is bothering you this evening?” Fitz asked as they walked.
“What do you mean, Fitz?” Diana asked. Hearing her say his name sent a shiver of pleasure through his body. He wanted to hear her say his name as he had his way with her body. With every growing minute, it seemed as though he wouldn’t be able to fully suppress his desire for her.
“When you greeted me, I noticed that your smile didn’t quite meet your eyes. It was a forced one. So, tell me what is wrong?”
