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Chapter 16
Diana had butterflies in her stomach as she paced back and forth at the top of the stairs of her family home. Tonight would be the dinner party in honour of all the guests that had arrived from Town and would be staying in the Duke’s manor.
She would be staying as well with her parents present so they could all be close to their family members who had all come. The time had arrived for Diana to finally face her siblings and do so with Fitz by her side.
That was one of the things that were causing Diana to be full of anxiety. The last few days with Fitz had been very enjoyable for her. At times she could tell that the man desired her, and since she felt the same way for him, she figured that at least the action of having children would be pleasurable for both of them. And though Diana knew that Fitz was still very much in love with his late wife and would probably never love her the same way, Diana sometimes wondered if that could honestly be true. When Fitz kissed her, sometimes those kisses weren’t needy and full of lust. When he’d kissed her simply on the forehead, she felt something other than desire. And that feeling made her wonder more about how Fitz truly felt about her.
Diana supposed that would be one of the things she would discover tonight. They would be surrounded by all sorts of people, to include her own family. Diana wanted to know how Fitz would act towards her when in a crowd. Would he still show her the same types of affection he had these last few days, or would he become someone she didn’t know at all?
She’d seen this happen to all of her siblings in the past. Diana knew who they truly were in private and would see them transform into a completely different individual when surrounded by others. It was as though they were performers in a players’ group, always rehearsing behind closed doors and ready to put on a show at a moment’s notice.
Diana was certain this was how all her siblings had been successfully married because they pretended to be people they weren’t. Diana could only imagine how put off their spouses had become once realizing their true nature.
“Diana, dear!” called her mother from the bottom of the stairs. “Are you ready to go?”
“Yes, Mother. I’m coming,” Diana said, trying not to allow her voice to be as shaky as she felt. She was riddled with nerves as she descended the stairs, ready to face the unknown. Diana tried to focus on the aspects of the night she was most looking forward to, to include getting to stay the night at the Duke’s home and to start realizing that soon it would be her own home.
“My word, how elegant you look this evening,” Lord Casey said as his eyes gleamed up at Diana with happiness riddled throughout his face. Diana chuckled as she used her free hand to run it down the front of her burgundy gown. The gown was made of high-quality silk and was a gift from the Duke for this special occasion. It had been so long since she’d had a new gown that she felt perfectly divine wearing it.
“I do have to say that this is the finest gown I’ve had the opportunity to wear,” Diana admitted as she made it down the stairs and turned slowly for her parents to see.
She was lucky to have a lady’s maid now to help her in and out of her clothes so she didn’t wrinkle one little piece of this magnificent gown. The sleeves came down to the middle of her forearm, and the neckline was modest, yet elegant.
As she breathed against the fitting fabric, she could feel her breasts pushing against the neckline, making her wonder if Fitz had the gown designed in such a way that he might gaze upon the very tops of them. It was another mystery that Diana was hoping to discover this evening.
“Well, let us be off. I don’t want to let the Duke be the sole host for the evening. I look forward to seeing my other children and getting to finally visit with a few of my grandchildren,” Lord Casey said with an excited feeling about him. None of her siblings had ever taken the time to bring their children to the country to meet their grandparents. Diana could easily reason why her parents were excited to reach the Duke’s home in a hurry.
Diana followed her parents out the door as a footman held it open for them. Another servant was at the ready to open the carriage door for them as they took a moment to steady themselves before stepping up into the carriage. It was another testament that her parents were growing older.
Hopefully, once they were all settled at the Duke’s home, she wouldn’t have to worry about them going up any more stairs or having to climb into a carriage. Diana was sure a downstairs bedchamber could be arranged for them.
Once settled in the carriage, Lord Casey rattled his knuckles on the side to signal they were ready to be off. Diana clasped her hands together as she did her best to settle her nerves. She took several long, deep breaths as the carriage rumbled through the village on the way to the Duke’s manor. Sometimes she would try to focus her eyes on the passing scenery and other times she would stare down at her hands.
“What has you so nervous about this evening?” Lady Casey asked. Diana looked up at her mother, wondering if she was being that obvious with her feelings.
“It is a big event, is all,” Diana said as she forced a smile to her lips. “There will be many people, and I will be seeing my siblings for the first time in many years. They have all been married and now have families of their own.”
“I know how you feel, my dear,” Lord Casey said with a sigh. “I do wish we could have had the opportunity to visit them more often in Town.”
“Do not feel so, Father. It is they who should have taken the time to come and visit us. None of them ever replied to my many letters or came to our rescue when we needed it most,” Diana said, trying to control her anger. She watched as both of her parents frowned and gave each other a particular look before focusing back on Diana.
“We understand why you feel the way you do, Diana. But I hope you won’t let your feelings get in the way of what is most important. We shall be spending the next few days together as a family for the first time since Gabriel was married,” Lord Casey said in a tentative voice.
“I see your point, Father,” Diana said with a deep sigh. “I will not voice my opinion in front of them and shall continue to confide in only you two.”
“But don’t forget the Duke, Diana. You can surely feel comfortable in confiding in him as your husband,” Lady Casey encouraged.
“That is true, Mama. I shall remember to do so once we are married and have the opportunity to speak freely with one another.” Diana thought how wonderful it was to have two doting parents. They were quick to give sound advice, and she would be a fool if she tried to act against such advice. She would have to bite her tongue and keep up her composure tonight if she was going to refrain from giving in to her anger.
The lane leading up to the manor was lined with torches that evening. As the sun began to set, plenty of light filled the manor and surrounding grounds. It made Diana think how perfect it would be for an evening stroll through the gardens with so many torches about. And when she thought of getting Fitz alone in the gardens with her, a deep blush came to her cheeks at such a bold thought. Her desirable thoughts always surprised her, and they seemed to come at the most inconvenient moment. Diana began to fan herself with her hands in an attempt to get the heat from her face to lessen.
When the carriage came to a stop in front of the manor, Diana could already see that several other carriages were currently parked in the courtyard as well. Many of the guests must have already arrived, no doubt eager to see the Duke. Stepping out of the carriage gave Diana a moment to take a deep breath of the cooling evening air to compose herself once more.
Diana followed behind her parents as they took the steps up to the front door of the manor. Diana could already hear all sorts of talking happening as she neared the foyer. The front door was already open, and they were greeted warmly by Mr Bingley.
“Good evening, Lord and Lady Casey. Miss Casey,” Mr Bingley said with a deep bow. “You’ll be pleased to hear that your family members have already arrived and are currently in the sitting room.”
“Thank you, Mr Bingley,” Lord Casey replied with a dip of his head. Diana watched as he led his wife eagerly towards the sitting room in search of their other children. Diana followed after them in a less eager fashion. She took her time, wanting to steady her rising nerves as much as possible. When she thought she was ready, Diana stepped into the lively sitting room.
