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What a great stubborn fool he had been! Not once, even after Fiona had showed him she loved him, had he told her that he loved her. How that must have hurt her, and he hadn't meant to hurt her. His sister Janet had always said he was spoiled and wanted his own way all the time. He had always denied it, believingthose qualities to be hers, not his. Now he realized that perhaps she had been right.
He did not regret taking Fiona Hay as his mistress in exchange for the cattle she had stolen from him. But after a few months he should have married the lass. He suspected he had been in love with her all along, from the moment she had ushered him into her tumbling-down tower house with such dignity and grace. She was every bit his equal, and he had always known it.
But he had never told her. Instead he had played a cruel game with her—taunting her, embarrassing her before all of Scotland, and pretending that he didn't care when the truth of the matter was he damned well cared. Now she was lost to him, and she didn't know that he loved her. Loved her above all women. Had always loved her, even if he hadn't admitted it. Had she, perhaps, known the feelings he couldn't, or wouldn't, express? Women were intuitive that way. Perhaps that was why she had been so patient with him.
He had to find her, tell her he loved her and wanted only her for his wife.He realized that the king was sending him off because he thought the situation hopeless and wanted to distract him. But it wasn't hopeless! Fiona was out there. She was alive, and whatever had happened, he wanted her back! And in this matter above all others, Angus Gordon meant to have his own way.
He reached Brae with a day-and-a-half's hard riding and immediately sent to Greymoor for his sister and brother-in-law. Jeannie Hay was at the castle when he arrived, and he was surprised to find Jamie-boy not so aggravated by her presence any longer, but then Jeannie was almost demure in her behavior, which was a decided change. When Janet and Hamish arrived, he gathered them all together and told them what had happened.
“There is no evidence of her anywhere,” he concluded.
“But who would steal Fiona?” Janet asked.
“I think ‘twas the cart that they were after. If the king's men had guided her away from Glen Gorm, she might have been safe and home at Brae, but they ran like cowards and left her to the brigands.”
“But they didn't kill her,” Hamish Stewart said thoughtfully. “They did not find her body or Nelly's, or evidence of graves, did they? There is more to this than meets the eye, Angus,” his brother-in-law decided.
“Aye, I agree with ye,” Angus Gordon said, “but I canna for the life of me figure out what it is. The king offered me the queen's young cousin, a sweet lass, in exchange for my loss, but of course I turned him down. Beth is sweet, but Jesu, a boring little wench!”
“We'll mount our own search,” Hamish Stewart said.
“I must return to Scone,” the laird said. “I am to go to England with Atholl on the king's business. I did not want to do it, but the king insisted, even commanding me and threatening to put us all to the horn if I did not cooperate. I believe he thinks to take my mind off my troubles. I am to be made Earl of Brae upon my return.”
“Are ye, now?” Hamish Stewart said thoughtfully. “I would say that the king is attempting to purchase yer cooperation, Angus. I know that ye served him in England as a lad, but he has made none of those others who were with him the offer of a title. I find it all most curious,” Hamish Stewart concluded.
“Don't look askance at an earldom,” Janet Gordon Stewart said tartly. “Angus Gordon, the Earl of Brae. My! Does it not sound grand?”
“It sounds verra grand,” her husband replied. “Too grand for Angus's role in the matter, Jan. Tell me again, Angus, about Fiona's abduction. She was taken in the Glen of Gorm, ye say.”
Carefully the laird went back over the story that the king had told him, thinking carefully, repeating it almost word for word.
“It seems to me that despite their inexperience the king's men were too quick to flee,” Hamish Stewart noted. “Why was that, do ye imagine? Why did not one think to turn Fiona's horse so she might go with them? A most curious incident, Angus.”
“What are ye saying, Hamish Stewart?” his wife demanded.
“Perhaps it was meant that Fiona Hay be abducted,” he replied.
“Hamish, yer a fool seeing shadows where none exist!” Janet returned. “Are ye saying that the king was in on some kind of plot? What possible reason could the king of Scotland have for such a thing? Neither Fiona nor Angus is important to him. I don't know where ye get such ideas.” She turned to her brother. “The king has rewarded ye because of yer loyalty and friendship. Think no more on it, my lord earl. Oh, I am so proud of ye, Angus Gordon, and I know that Father would be, too. An earldom for Brae! Who would have thought such a thing would ever happen?” She kissed his cheek and sniffled noisily, her eyes misty.
“But where is my sister?” Jeannie Hay demanded, suddenly her old self again. “Ye love her, Angus. Will ye be content to simply let her disappear?”
“The king has promised to send another search party out to seek my lass,” the laird said. “If she is alive, I will not desert her no matter what, Jeannie. I do indeed love her.”
“We'll look ourselves, lassie, while Angus is in England,” Hamish Stewart said. He was not satisfied with the simplistic answer his wife had given her eldest brother. He was a Stewart, and he knew how complicated the Stewart mind could be. For the life of him, however, he could not figure out why the king had separated Angus and Fiona. What reason could there possibly be for such a thing?
Angus Gordon was uncomfortable being back at Brae. Everywhere he went evoked a memory of Fiona Hay. In desperation he took his horse one day and rode up Ben Hay. The tower house was bleak and deserted, his men having withdrawn months ago. Fiona's brothers-in-law had been made to understand that Ben Hay and its tower belonged to her. Stepping into the hall of the tower house, he recalled the wedding that had taken place there that morning so long ago. He could almost see Fiona standing haughtily, a length of Hay tartan across her then skinny chest, the chieftain's badge gleaming from her shoulder. How proud she had been, successfully marrying off Elsbeth and Margery, knowing that she had secured the futures of her five siblings, that she had done her duty as she had promised her dying mother she would when she was just a child herself.
“Yer alive, lass,” he said softly. “I can feel it. Yer too strong to have disappeared off the face of the earth. We'll find ye, Fiona Hay. I found ye once. I'll find ye again. I don't intend losing ye forever.”
Angus Gordon then rode back down the ben to Brae. He called to Hamish to join him in a goblet of wine. “Ye'll seek for her, will ye not?” he asked him.
Hamish nodded. “I will. Jan's explanation maywell be the truth, but I'm a cautious man and a wee bit distrustful, particularly of another Stewart. We're a canny family, Angus.”
“I appreciate yer help, Hamish. She is out there somewhere. I know it!”
“I think ye may well be right,” Hamish agreed. “I am curious, however, as to why this happened, but I suppose we'll not ever know that unless the king knows and is willing to tell.”
Angus Gordon left Brae the following day and returned to Scone. If he could not look for Fiona himself, he knew that Hamish would seek after her, for Hamish loved nothing better than a conundrum except solving one, and this matter was indeed a puzzle. And two days after his return to Scone, he departed it, riding south with the Earl of Atholl and a small party of men for England.
