Page 73 of Jerk Neighbor


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She imitated a cat nuzzle against his neck. “You mean the boyfriend girlfriend thing? Making it true?”

“Yes. Where you go for New Year's Eve, I go.”

“I feel like you should be offering me a sparkly bracelet with letters spelling the word on it.”

“Barfy-barfy love?” he chuckled.

“Girlfriend. Barfy-barfy love comes later.”

“Why can’t it come now?” He stared into her eyes for a long, disturbing moment.

“Because I need to know a man a lot longer than forty-eight hours before I say I love you.”

His voice became very deep. “Then if I said those words now, you’d do…what?”

She looked at him sidelong. “I don’t say I love you to a man unless I mean it, Bastian.”

“I don’t either.”

“Anyway…if we do this and you do come along, I need to warn you. My family is not like yours.”

“I think that’s clear.”

“Only informal introductions are allowed. Except Calvin is like you, he might not even greet you. Also, my mom calls everyone baby and the first thing she will say to you when she meets you isI want to know all about you. It’s a little scary to some people. Are you brave?”

“I will be for you.”

“My dad is a nut about archery. He makes his own longbows. And he has about a zillion other hobbies. Everybody likes him, you will too, but if you get him talking about archery that’s the end of the holiday as far as everybody else is concerned. We won’t see you or Dad again.”

“Okay,” he laughed. “What does he do?”

“He’s in commercial property like your father. But Dad is a commercial realtor. He travels all over the Pacific Northwest. I take after him more than mom. We’re both crazy with the workaholic stuff.”

“What does your mother do?”

“She’s ten years older than Dad, so she’s retired. Or she would be. She was one year from early retirement as an obstetrics nurse when she had the dire misfortune to be working the day one of the doctors didn’t look where he was going and pushed a medical cart into her. She hurt her knee and when she ran out of sick days, they fired her.”

Bastian frowned. “Fired her?”

“Fired her.”

He shook his head. “That’s unbelievable. I know several lawyers if you want to take action on that.”

“That was years ago, beyond the statute of limitations on personal injury. We tried to get her to take them to court, but Mom just ignored it and plowed on through, thinking she’d heal up. She’s so stubborn.”

“You mentioned your friend Pris a few times.”

“Pris?” She was confused. “You mean Priscilla?”

“Yeah. Tell me about her.”

“Oh, you’re looking for my entire history now?”

“You said it yourself, I should know more about my girlfriend.”

“Is that what I said?”

“That’s how I heard it.”

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