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“May I please have a vodka tonic?”
Yup, nothing. But that nothing sparks something, a fuse in my bloodstream.
“Why didn’t you tell me you were coming?”
She shrugs.
And now the fuse blows up, causing an eruption that leaves my blood boiling. “We talk every day. Why would you not mention it?”
Her face reddens. “I didn’t think it was important.”
“It is important.”
Her breath catches and her skin turns even darker. Her gaze drifts beyond me to my friends. “You don’t have to worry about me, Jax. I’m not here to ruin anything for you.”
Except she just ruined everything. My night, my mood, all has gone to shit.
“Forget the vodka tonic. Go back to your friends and your party. I have some shopping I need to do, anyway.”
She moves to stand and my hand shoots out to grab her wrist. Her skin is hot and it’s comforting because something is as it should be. “It’s not like that.”
Her lips curve into a sardonic smile. “No explanation necessary. It’s not that serious. Go to the pub crawl and have fun. Text me if you have some free time this weekend.”
I’m stunned and she takes advantage, wriggling her arm free. She walks away, swaying those hips and not once looking back. Her steps are measured, like there is no hurry and she left nothing behind.
It’s not that serious.
My body grows hot, like instead of words she doused me with gasoline and then set me on fire. She shows up here, unannounced, takes a righteous attitude, and walks away after pissing me the fuck off. She’s acting like a girlfriend that caught me cheating.I wasn’t even flirting.
If it’s not that serious to her, it’s not that serious to me either.
* * *
Saona
I think I’m having a heart attack. This time for real. My heart won’t stop pounding and my skin is on fire. I’m so embarrassed I could die. Between the Harbor East shops and the mall in the Inner Harbor, I have seven bags. I bought shit I don’t need and some I’m not sure I even want. All in hope of shutting off my brain and my shame.
I’m so fucking stupid.
I had this dumb fantasy. Jax would see me and get all happy and I would be slick and tell him to meet me upstairs and it would be hot like our first time but without me being nervous and awkward. It would be sexy and dirty and so good. So, so good.
Except, it wouldn’t be that. Not now or ever.
Because he was flirting with another woman and they were planning a double date and instead of backing out of the bar as quietly as I came in, I decided to stay. I listened to the whole thing with my heart in my throat and my hopes dragging on the floor. I was so embarrassed already that when he finally saw me, all I wanted was to save face. I handled it all wrong. I was cold and bitchy and I need to stop thinking.
I find a restaurant overlooking the water and go inside and grab a seat by the bar. The cute bartender, early twenties and way too skinny with his hair slicked back, and a smile like a mall kiosk salesman, heads my way. He starts telling me about their drink specials and their signature drink, Between the Sheets. He says it’s bound to fix all my problems. I want to tell him to shut up and make me one.
Instead, I ask, “Is it strong?”
The watts in his smile go up. “I can make it extra strong.”
I point at him and even push a smile on my lips. “Do that.”
Thirty minutes later, I am floating in a cloud of no shame. “You’re a god, Tyler. This is wonderful.”
He gives me a laugh and I should give him all the cash in my purse right now because he and his magical drink deserve it all.
But then my phone vibrates and my stomach sinks when I see Jax’s name.
