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“What do you mean?” Ellie asked. As far as she knew, she wasn’t a celebrity among the cadets.
“You are one of the best in this class! You seem to know every answer to the questions Grayson asks. Plus, you are super nice.” Just as she’d felt moments before the partners were announced, Brett was bubbling with enthusiasm. His smile could light up the darkest of days, and she couldn’t believe she was able to make such an attractive man so excited to partner with her.
Iamnice,Ellie reminded herself.Maybe she was judging Brett too harshly. A warm blush rose in her cheeks at the thought. She was embarrassed of herself for being so judgy.
“Thanks,” she said, returning his smile before spreading her map out on his desk. “What are you thinking about a plan?”
“Plan?” Brett looked at her, curving up one of his thick brown brows.
Ellie’s chest tightened, and she took a deep breath, calming her body from the anxiety she had about being seen as the best in this class—and all the expectations that were put upon her for it.
“We need to plan out where we should camp and how to use our supplies wisely,” she explained. Ellie always needed a strategy. Even if it was as simple as what chores she wanted to get done during the day.
Brett nodded, flicking his eyes to the map. “Right…” His voice sounded so soft and unsure that, for a moment, Ellie forgot about the grades and suddenly felt a need to protect.Maybe it won’t be so bad. Maybe he just needs a good partner.
“Have you been camping before?” she asked after watching his eyes bounce around their map. His silence was gnawing inside of her. She needed to know how much Brett knew about the wilderness.
“No.” Brett didn’t look up from studying the map. Ellie was glad he didn’t see her face, feeling that there must have been a look of judgment there. “I have always wanted to, though.”
“Well, now’s your chance. Good enough a time to start as ever.” She delivered the lines through gritted teeth, trying to remind herself,Be nice! Be nice!
He looked up to the board with the list of supplies behind her. “Should we start with the supply list? How do you think we should split them up in case we get separated?”
“What? Why would we get separated?” The fact that he jumped straight from looking at the map to thinking about supplies and the possibility of losing each other in the woods had Ellie returning to her assessment that Brett was hardly prepared for their task. She regarded him with wide eyes, hoping he had an explanation.
Brett pointed to the map. “It looks like our path is along this river.” His finger traced the red line of their trail along the blue vein of the water. “What if one of us falls in?”
The cat inside of her hissed, and she shot her hand up while scanning the room for Grayson. Ellie had been so stuck on trying to figure out how Brett had gone through his life this long without ever camping that she hadn’t bothered to look at the map herself. Now, on top of an incompetent partner, she had to worry aboutwater?
Shehatedgetting even her feet wet. Not just now but back when she was still human, too. Ellie had one strong pre-experimentation memory of stepping into a puddle on her way to school and having to sit most of the day with a wet sneaker. To this day, the second her socks get saturated, she was miserable. Especially if she was stuck in a scenario where she couldn’t remove them.
Now that her regular distaste for water was combined with cat instincts, she hated even theideaof uncontrolled water. Showers, sure. Pools, not really her thing, but at least she could choose to jump in or not. A wild river? No. No way.
Grayson nodded her way, beckoning her to ask her question from across the room.
“Our trail is along the river,” she said, voice strained. Her mind was short-circuiting, barely able to string together words. Ellie still struggled with her new urges. Turning into a cat shifter so late in life had not been an easy adjustment. The others, who’d been born shifters, had their entire lifetime to get used to their animal side. She’d only had over a year.
“Yes,” Grayson replied. “Some groups will need to travel by water. You’ll find rafts you can use along the way.”
“But this isn’t a small little lazy river!” Ellie protested. “It’s a big Canadian one with rushing water and rocks and… and…”
“Rapids, yes,” Grayson said as though it were of no consequence before turning to answer another classmate’s question.
Ellie felt the walls closing in on her. There was no way she could avoid getting wet if they were boating down rapids. This wasn’t fair. The first opportunity to go camping as a shifter, and she had to gorafting!
“So… splitting the supplies… How do you want to do that?” Brett’s downturned eyes were wide, reminding Ellie of a lost puppy. He was oblivious to the panic going on inside of her.
Ellie swallowed, shutting her eyes to try to center herself and get her pussy back under control. She sucked in a deep breath through her nose and blew it out through her mouth forcefully, focusing on the sensation and sound. It was a trick Paige had taught her so she could ground herself—useful when distracting herself from chasing balls of yarn when she walked by the hobby shop in town. Unfortunately, it wasn’t making a lick of difference now. But she’d have to force herself to focus and move on.
“We need to evenly split the food. And I would like all the tuna pouches if you don’t mind.” Ellie exhaled with a heavy sigh. “And maybe we should see how far we can make it each day without needing a break. I am sure some parts of the rapids are worse than others, so we can plan that as we go. We just have to be mindful of how much daylight is left in the day.”
Things felt better now. Ellie liked solving problems, and now she was working her way through this one. Their trip would be like a puzzle, and making it through without getting soaked was just a piece that she had to be prepared for. Maybe she could still enjoy herself.I can do this, she reassured herself.
Brett pressed his lips together, nodding. “That makes sense to me.”
He squinted as he studied the map, running his long fingers through his wavy brown hair as he did so. Ellie smiled, despite everything else going on. Brett had such a carefree demeanor, combined with some Harry Styles-type good looks. Brett had to know this would be a difficult journey, yet he remained focused and unflappable.
Part of Ellie was angry and disappointed in herself. Brett was too nice to be the focus of her ire. It wasn’t his fault he was her partner. It was unfair of her to take that out of him. She felt guilty for the thoughts she had earlier, assuming he would make her get a bad grade on this assignment. Maybe he wasn’t going to be as bad of a partner as she initially thought.
