Page 60 of Lost Without You

And when she wrapped her arms around my neck, still laughing, I knew...

This was my forever.

She was my always.

* * *

Hours later, and I was afraid that things were going to change again.

I was afraid that Savannah wanted this morning’s events knowing that we were going back to San Diego and back to our “other” life.

But screw that.

My life lost its brightness once before, when Savannah pushed away the first time; it wasn’t going to happen again.

When I walked her to her apartment door, I wanted nothing more than to ask to come in with her.

But I also knew she likely needed time to process. She’d need time to be with her thoughts, and sort through everything.

It’s not like last time. She’s not pushing you away. You’ve smiled, and kissed, and held hands for the last six hours. You laughed and joked and made love twice this morning. This is not like last time.

“You’ll call if you need anything?” I asked, adjusting her back pack from my shoulder, down to the floor.

Her smile was wide. “I’m literally doing laundry and then going to bed. We’ll talk tomorrow. Go sleep in your own bed.”

I’d slept next to her for the last four nights; I didn’t know how I was going to manage to sleep in my own bed, without her, tonight.

“I love you,” I said softly, squeezing the hand I still held.

“I love you, too, Ryan.” She went up to tiptoe to kiss me, and I brought the kiss a little deeper, a little more indecent.

She laughed when she pulled away. “I’ll see you later, Ryan.”

I let her go, watching the door shut quietly behind her, before making my way slowly, lonely, down the hallway, toward my own apartment.

Mitch and I lived on the same floor as Savannah, but clear on the other end. Where she was in a smaller one bedroom with a balcony, we had a two-bedroom san balcony.

I used my key to enter my place, not at all surprised with how quiet and dim it was. “Mitch?”

When he didn’t answer, I figured he was at the hospital or out for the moment.

With my phone beside me the whole time in case Savannah needed me, I got back to normal life.

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