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LACHLAN
Thanks to Tabatha,I found Saff in the sparring room. She was going to town on one of the bags. “Do you want to use me and get some of that energy out?"
Her scowl landed on me, and I kept my expression neutral, knowing she had to be hurting. What Gabe did was out of order. The moment I saw we were having a briefing, I asked Tabs where the hell she was. We'd been so confused, especially since it was about a mission to go after the Ignos again. I understood Gabe's hesitation, but still, this was Saff. The Ignos owed her blood.
"Put on gloves or get out. I'm not in the mood."
I stepped toward her. "Look, I know you need to blow off some steam, and I’m happy to be your punching bag. There are other ways we could work out some of that energy, but I mostly want to give you a hug."
"There are cameras in here."
"Tabatha turned them off. But that’s not the kind of hug I meant. I meant one that comforts because you look like you could use one."
She swiped her nose with the back of her glove. “I'm fine."
"Right. Of course. Fine, like always."
I walked around to the other side of the bag so I could watch her face. Tears were streaming down her cheeks, and she was gritting her teeth, clamping too hard on her mouth guard. “You're too tense. Just let it go."
“I will not let it go. Oversight said I was good. He purposely didn't tell me."
“I know, baby," I crooned.
"He didn't tell me, Lock. He kept it from me. He made me feel like I was useless. Like I wasn't ready. And when she said she was confused that I wasn't a field agent yet, I’d thought Oversight had said no. It turns out this whole time it was Gabe. He was keeping me from all of it."
I could kill him for hurting her, but I knew he was her brother. There was a line, and I had to tread lightly. "What he did is bullshit. I know that. You know that. He knows it. He still did it anyway. There's a part of him that is trying to protect you because he’s your brother."
“I don't have a brother."
"Saff, you do have a brother, and he does love you. He just royally fucked up."
"This isn't fucking up, Lock. This is lying and manipulation. Which, you know, we're clandestine agents, so I guess it’s par for the course. God. He humiliated me on purpose. In front of everyone."
"No one else knows what's going on."
"Oh, they know. They know."
I didn’t want to defend him, but at some point in the future when she was ready to talk to him again, she would need help seeing things differently. "No, they don't. Gabe loves you. He doesn't want to embarrass you. You saw how Madeline looked confused as to why you weren't in the meeting. She has no idea what's going on. Which means no one else does either."
Her brow furrowed as she tried to work out that fact, and she nodded. “I can't do this right now, Lock. I just—"
“I know. I'm just here to help you hit stuff." She lifted her head, our gazes finally meeting. “I'm here for you. So, how about I give you a hug and then help you figure out all ways we can kick your brother's ass?"
"He's not my brother."
“Yes, he is. As mad as you are at him, as shitty as what he did was, he's still your brother. That doesn't change just because you have a fight.”
Coaxing her into my arms didn't take much once I stepped around the punching bag. She came in easily, tucked her face against my chest, and sobbed.
She was always so independent and strong, always holding it together. But Gabe had broken her. He'd hurt her in a way that no one else could, and she deserved to cry. I wasn’t sure how long we stood like that. Me holding her, rubbing her back, soothing her. When she finally pulled her head back, she gave me a nod, once again using the back of her gloves to wipe the tears away. Then she did the unexpected and swept my leg. When I was lying in a heap, staring at the ceiling, coughing, she shook her head. "Like I said, always keep your guard up."
I laughed. “I hear you, Saff."
She was in there somewhere. Pissed off, I could work with.
"Now let me get gloves on and actually give you a fair fight."
“You still can't take me."
