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TWENTY
Matthew
I couldn’t stop thinking about Noelle—awoman I was beginning to have feelings for. But if I was being honest… I was falling for her. Hard.
I shouldn’t be spending all day thinking about her—definitely not the particularly explicit thoughts that danced through my brain. Of her naked, only wearing her skirt as she sat on my desk. Of her taste as I licked her over and over. Of—God, I needed to stop before I got hard at work. Again. I pushed the thought aside, writing 100% at the top of the paper in front of me before flipping to the next one in the stack. It was useless, though, as I was hardly able to concentrate on anything but the thought of having her in my arms again, kissing her, how she might look on her knees for me—
Fuck. She was mine, and all I wanted to do was prove that to her. I had declared as much. Had felt it the moment I set my eyes on her. She was supposed to be mine, supposed to be by my side. The curves of her body were the thing I saw every time I closed my eyes, and God, all I wanted was to have her like that again.
But she didn’t want to date anyone. She had said so explicitly. Had looked her classmate straight in the eyes and said I’m just not in a place in my life right now where I’m looking for that. And fuck—I knew she needed time. She had told me as much, and I would wait however long she needed before she was ready for this. For us. Because she was my girl—had been for a while, really, and I wanted… everything from her. And when she promised me no dates… Well, I hoped I wasn’t excluded from that list forever.
I picked up my phone, pulled up her contact, and typed in a simple message.
Me: Come to my office after your class.
Noelle: Demanding now, are we, prof?
Me: I want to see you.
Me: Come, please?
Noelle: Only if you promise not to keep my underwear again.
Me: I can’t promise that baby.
Noelle: Steal another pair, and I’m going to make you buy me more.
Me: I’ll buy you whatever you want, sweetheart, as long as I can get you in my arms again.
Noelle: Romantic today, huh, Matthew? I like it.
I snorted. Who was this girl that was making me do stupid things like keeping her panties? It wasn’t like I was doing anything with them—but the thought of her walking away from me, still wet and not wearing anything under her clothes… Well, that thought may have stayed with me some nights. And in the shower.
She was there, after class, waiting by my office door, arms wrapped around some textbooks.I thought that perhaps she never looked as beautiful as she had the other day, in my arms—
“You know, I don’t normally do this,” I said, looking at her as I unlocked my door, feeling my neck burning at the telltale signs of my embarrassment.We walked into the office, and she quickly dropped onto the chair across from mine, waiting for me to settle into my own.
“What,” she asked, tilting her head at me with a smirk on her lips, “fuck someone in your office?”
“Noelle,” I groaned. “I didn’t mean—” I flushed red, and I was sure the back of my neck was going to be all red and splotchy.
“You’ve already seen me naked, Matthew. I hardly think now is the time to be embarrassed about this.”
“I just wanted you to know that I don’t normally—I’m not…” I trailed off, not finding a suitable ending to my thought.
I wanted to say things like I’m not one to mess around with anyone.I can’t get you out of my mind.I want you again, and so help me, I can’t get the sound of your little moans out of my head. Even more embarrassing, was the simple and plain truth. That was the best damn sex I’ve ever had. It’s never been like that for me before.
She paced closer to me, setting herself against the edge of my desk, leaning on it as she brushed a hand against my leg. I’ve been mesmerized since I first saw you, I couldn’t bring myself to say. She had said she didn’t want to date anyone, and yet, after a text from me, she was here. Sitting in front of me.
Did she just want to hook up again? Fuck that. I wanted everything from this woman—her smiles and her laughs, and sure, her pleasure and her moans, too. Still, there was more there. I hate the way I’m attracted to you. So much so that I can’t get you out of my mind, but… But all I can do is think about you—
“I’m not trying to take advantage of you,” I finally got out. “I just… I don’t normally do casual relationships.” Which seemed to be the wrong thing to say, because she cleared her throat, hopping onto the desk and crossing her knees as she stared at me, as if to say, well, you slept with me.
I tried again. “Noelle. It’s just—God—you’re the most beautiful woman I’ve ever laid eyes on. This isn’t just sex for me, baby. I need you to know that. I need you to know that I’ve never done this before. I don’t want you to get the wrong idea because that’s not what this is for me.” I’m not in the habit of bringing women to my office and having my way with them.Just you. There would only ever be just you.
“So… you don’t want me?” she asked, brushing a hair behind her ear. “This seems like a moment where there should be a but.” Then she laughed, a warm sound that filled me with more feelings than I cared to admit.
“I always want you.” I practically growled out at her, grinding my teeth. “But… We really shouldn’t do this,” I finally said.And I was being truthful, we shouldn’t. We shouldn’t see each other like this, shouldn’t want each other the way we did.
