AllFreeNovel
Share Us
I dressed in my favorite yoga pants and an oversized sweater, and already felt better. In the kitchen, I put the kettle on the stove to make ginger tea for the nausea. Sadie had brought me a bag of ginger biscuits to nibble on, and when I did, I found I could keep it down. I knew I had to eat right, and I would in time. Again, I was just finding my feet.
The first thing I needed to do through all of this was to be gentle with myself. It was going to be a long, hard road ahead.
When the kettle boiled, I poured hot water onto freshly sliced ginger, and the smell filled my kitchen. For the first time since I’d found out I was pregnant, my stomach didn’t turn and threaten to get rid of its contents. I took a few deep breaths.
Things would look up, and I was going to be okay. Right now, I was positive—the contract with Mrs. Collier had been taken care of, and I was ready for what came. I had to hold on to this positivity and remember what it felt like so I could come back to this on the bad days.
I picked up my cup, trying to decide if I should get in bed or curl up under a blanket on the couch, when someone knocked on my door. I walked to the door with my cup in my hand.
Parker stood in front of me when I opened it, and I stared at him.
“Can I come in?” he asked after I didn’t make a move to invite him in.
“I ... don’t know.” I felt like a deer in the headlights. I’d cried my eyes out over him so many nights in a row, and I’d been trying to convince myself I was better off if I never saw him again.
Now, he stood in front of me, larger than life.
He was handsome and the expression on his face was gentle and warm, and that made me want to cry.
“I won't take a lot of your time,” he promised.
I finally nodded and stepped aside. When Parker walked into the room, his presence filled it. He was the kind of guy who commanded respect wherever he went.
He looked dashing in a three-piece suit, with a long coat over it. Everything about Parker screamed not only money, but class.
“I was wrong,” he said, turning to face me. “I shouldn’t have treated you the way I did.”
I shook my head. “I don’t understand.”
“I didn’t realize what a hold my ex-wife still had on me,” Parker said. “She was there, in my apartment lobby, just before you arrived and she always has a way of working me up so much that I spin out. And you got the brunt of me lashing out. It wasn’t fair. And I’m sorry.”
I stared at Parker. Of all the things I’d expected of my life moving forward, such a sincere apology without excuses wasn’t one of them. My ears started ringing.
“I want to try again,” Parker said. “You have no idea how serious I am about you. I know it hasn’t been long—”
“I can’t,” I blurted out.
“What?” Parker stared at me.
I shook my head and glanced at my cup. The water was a little yellow with the ginger I’d put in it. “I just can’t do this,” I said again. “I can’t be with anyone right now. I have to focus on my career.” I glanced up at him. The shock on his face, the pain, was almost unbearable.
Dammit, I hated doing this to him. IwantedParker. Not just because he was so drop-dead gorgeous and the world’s sexiest man, but because he was an amazing person.
But what life did I have to offer him? I was pregnant. If he thought I’d wanted his money before, it was going to be a whole different game when I told him I was having a baby.
This wasn’t right. It wasn’t what I wanted for us.
“I don’t understand,” he finally said. “How can you—”
“You were wrong to send me away, but I understand why you did, and it was a blessing in disguise. For both of us. We’re not just in the right space to be together. You have your business to worry about, and I have mine.”
I walked to the kitchen. Parker followed me. I didn’t offer him anything to drink—I didn’t want to give him a reason to stay. Even though sending him away would break me.
“You can’t mean that,” Parker said. “If anyone understands what it's like to have a career, goals you want to achieve, it’s me. But that doesn’t mean that we can’t be together.”
I spun around. “That’s not the only reason,” I said. “You and Ryan aren’t friends anymore because of me. I won’t do that to you. You guys should be friends again. It was wrong that we were together in the first place—”
“Don’t say that,” Parker said. “Haven’t you seen how much I’m willing to sacrifice for you? Ryan and I can patch things up. We can figure it out, without having to give up what we have. I don’t think—”
