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How difficult it must be for Emma to understand what is happening in her life. To think that she would fear someone taking her daddy away broke Grace’s heart. She hugged Emma, smoothing the curls from her face and looking into her anxious eyes. “No. Never. No one is going to take your daddy from you. I’m going out to dinner with him so we can talk.”
“About me?” Emma asked, leaning closer to Grace as she played with the gold necklace she was wearing.
“Probably some,” she answered honestly. She saw the downcast look in Emma’s eyes, and wanted to hold on to her forever. “Do you mind?”
Emma snuggled closer to Grace. “Has my mommy really gone to be with the angels?”
“Yes. Your mommy is in heaven with the angels.”
“How do you know?” Emma asked, her dark eyes wide in question.
“I just know. Someone who loved you so much would definitely be in heaven,” Grace said. What if she’d said the wrong thing? What if Lisa or Aidan had given Emma a different explanation? She glanced hurriedly at Lisa, to see her nodding slowly.
Grace clung to the little girl, feeling connected to her, imagining what it would have been like to hold her own baby. What would it have been like to give birth to a wonderful little girl just like Emma?
No! She couldn’t think those thoughts anymore. She would never have a baby of her own, and she had to stop wishing she could. With Aidan able to have a child, and despite the gynecologist saying they could find no reason she couldn’t conceive, the fault for not having children had to be hers.
She sensed someone standing behind her. Glancing up she saw Aidan, an expression of wonder on his face.
“Emma needed a little comforting,” she offered, the air seeming to be suspended between them. She searched for words to express her feelings, the changes this child had wrought. Changes that went so deep they rocked Grace’s belief in herself.
He knelt beside her. “You are so good with Emma,” he said, his eyes dark with awareness as his hand touched her shoulder.
For the longest minute, she wanted him to take her in his arms and kiss her breathless, show her how much he cared by making love to her. It took all her willpower not to act on her feelings. But if everything went well in the next few weeks, she might not have to resist her feelings.
“I think it’s time we got to the restaurant,” she said, holding back the loving, bittersweet emotions his touch sparked.
“Whatever you say,” he offered, taking Emma in his arms and brushing the curls off her face. “Emma, Daddy is going out with Grace, but I’ll be back.” He kissed her round cheeks, making her laugh, a beautiful sound that tugged hard on Grace’s heart. She needed to leave before she lost her determination to stay removed from this scene.
Still in her father’s arms, Emma reached for Grace. “Hug. I want a hug.”
Stepping closer to Aidan, Grace kissed Emma’s cheek and, in doing so, breathed in the cologne she’d given Aidan for Christmas. She felt light-headed at the nearness of him, the possibilities of the evening ahead. “Good night, Emma.”
“Good night,” Emma said, giving Grace a big, noisy kiss and a smile as she waved.
It took every bit of energy to move away out of Aidan’s reach. Grace wanted to touch him, to feel his skin, soak in his scent, but it was too dangerous. She had to keep her head clear, focus on working out the issues between them.
Tonight was the beginning of the changes needed to make her feel included, be part of Emma’s life and to find a way to resolve her feelings of betrayal. If they were to have a life together, it had to be on equal terms. Even the thought of what would happen if it all went wrong again made her frightened, her courage deserting her.
