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I can’t breathe. No matter how many times I try to suck in air, it doesn’t make its way to my lungs. Is it physically possible to have a heart attack from heartbreak because I’m pretty positive that’s what’s happening right now.
Frank remains calm beside me as he steers me toward the car, but I lean my hand against the door as the driver we arranged for the night gets out to open it for us. Frank must motion for him to leave us alone because he gets back in the car, giving me privacy.
Frank’s steady voice grounds me. “Focus on breathing; that’s your only job right now.”
I don’t know how long we stand there, in the middle of a Boston city street, outside of my bar, on a late Wednesday night, but it’s long enough for me to feel embarrassed once I’ve finally managed to gain control.
With my palms against the car and my head hung low, I feel like I’ve been hit by a bus. “When is this going to end? When will it stop hurting?”
Frank’s arm finds its way to my shoulder and he squeezes. “When you talk to her. When you let go of the anger. When you get her back.”
I jolt up. That can’t possibly be his answer. That I forgive her for her betrayal.
“You…I…” I can’t even form a sentence.
“What had you so upset in there? What happened?”
Rubbing my hand over my face, I try to scrub the entire conversation from my mind. “Hanson’s brother…Hayden, the one who’s dating her. He said he’s going to ask her to go to London with him. I think maybe that’s still home for him?” I ask more than say. Frank will find out.
He nods. “Okay. So, she’s dating. We already knew that. It’s been all over the papers.”
I roll my neck trying to find a comfortable position, but I think it’s useless. I’m itching to get out of my own skin. To get out of my head. “I need a drink,” I plead.
Frank just glares at me. “No. When are you going to realize that the drinking is half your problem? Cash, you need a clear head.”
“She’s going to fucking Black Label with him this weekend.”
“The sex club?” Frank says, quirking his brow.
A breath rushes out of my nose, and I feel my entire body tense again. “Yes.”
“Well, you know what that means, don’t you?” Frank says.
I grit my teeth. I know exactly what it means. If she hasn’t slept with Hayden yet, she will that night.
