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Hayden watches my every move with a smile on his face. “I’m not interested in a fling, Grace. I’m looking for the real thing.”
Smiling, I sing, “Well, do I have the woman for you. Her name is Sarah, and she is my newest bachelorette. Thirty-three, a business executive, gorgeous and quite funny. I may have a crush on her myself,” I say with a laugh.
Hayden meets my eyes and holds them for a beat before responding, as if he’s gauging something before he speaks. “Are you getting back together with Cash?”
I almost choke on my bread. “God, Hayden,” I say, taking a sip of water while he stares at me with concerned eyes. “Warn a girl before you jump right into the hard stuff.”
His eyes dance as he waits for me to respond. I sigh. “I don’t know. Honestly, I really don’t know. I mean I’m having his baby. That much I know.”
Hayden reaches out and grabs my hand, squeezing it. “Just because you’re pregnant with his child does not mean you have to take him back.”
I don’t know why every time this man talks today, I cry. The tears well below my lids and I bite my lip trying to control my emotions. “I didn’t have a father, Hayden. I never knew him, and every man my mom brought around never wanted anything to do with me. I was always…” I pause because I hate even saying it despite the fact that it’s true. “I was always a burden. I moved in with Marion in middle school because my mother felt I was cramping her style, and I never went back. I mean there were months where I didn’t evenseemy own mother…I don’t want that for my child.”
In one quick movement Hayden is by my side, kneeling and cradling my face as he looks up at me. “Grace, you will never have that for your child because you are not your mother. You deserve the world, and I for one would feel honored to give it to you.”
My breath is caught in my throat as I stare down at him. What is he doing? People glance in our direction as I make a scene with my tears. “Hayden, stand up,” I whisper shout, already feeling the camera lenses focused in our direction.
He laughs and rolls his eyes. “Stop worrying about the rest of the world, Grace. What do you want? Really think about that, and then know that if there’s even a chance that it’s me, I’ll happily drop down on this knee again.”
I pull him up by his shirt and push him toward his chair. “Will you stop it! You’re so smooth these lines just come rolling off your tongue.” I tsk at him and he just shakes his head.
“It’s not a line, Grace. I’m serious. Cash isn’t your only option. If there’s a ring, consider my hat tossed in.”
My stomach clenches. This was not how the night was supposed to go. I need Hayden as my friend, and he’s respected that for the last few months. Sure, he’s flirted and made it clear he’s interested in more, but once we found out I was pregnant, I figured that would end. Is he nuts?
“Hayden,” I say his name as if it’s a sentence and he lifts his eyes to mine, holding his breath. “You have literally become one of my closest friends. I don’t want to lose that.”
He shakes his head. “And you never will. Grace, I kept my hands to myself and my lips sealed because I knew you were wearing a bruised heart. I thought I had time to tell you how I felt, but then you found out you were pregnant, and my feelings didn’t change. I don’t care that this baby is Cash’s. And honestly, if he makes you happy, then I will stand back and remain your friend, but if he doesn’t, if you are only going back to him because you think you don’t have other options, I want you to know…you have me. As a friend or as more, if that’s something that interests you.”
He’s so confident as he speaks, so strong in his conviction, and his words are filled with nothing but sincere love. I don’t have any illusions that he’sinlove with me. We’ve never really kissed. Hell, I’m not sure there is actually chemistry here, not that I’ve ever given it a chance. But I know in my heart that Hayden is a good man, and he loves me as a friend, and if given the opportunity we could likely have a good life together. But is that enough? After experiencing the intoxicating love of Cash, could anything short of that ever be enough? And is it even possible to get that back with Cash?
Without answers to any of these questions, I simply nod my head and thank Hayden for his kind words. “I don’t have an answer for you tonight, Hayden. Just give me some time to think?” I offer, scared to pull the trigger on any decision at this point.
Hayden reaches across the table and squeezes my hand again. “I’m not going anywhere.”
“Except to London,” I tease.
He smiles. “Yes, except to London. But the offer remains—if you change your mind I’ll fly back and pick you up, doctor in tow, and all the support you’ll ever need. If not, I’ll see you in the New Year.”
I bite the inside of my lip. It seems that I have all sorts of decisions to make and I’m running out of time to make them.
