“I-I don’t want…I’m not looking for…” Romi swallowed loudly. Kiera
stayed where she was, just a few feet away. Uncertainty flickered over her
face. “I mean, yes, I want this. If I’m being honest, yes. I do. But there are
reasons that it can’t happen. That it shouldn’t.”
“Because I’m too old? Because you’re not looking for a relationship?
Because you don’t want to get involved with your boss? Because you think
you’re just going to be a passing fancy?”
“Yes. Yes, all of those things.” The hard truth spilled out. Romi didn’t
want to keep it bottled up inside, but it hurt to admit it. Her voice sounded
strange to her. She thought that maybe she was actually in shock.
Maybe I really am dreaming after all, because there is no way this can be
real.
“You aren’t. You won’t be. You could never be,” Kiera whispered. Her
eyes shot to Romi’s face. “I didn’t want this to happen. I kept telling myself
that it couldn’t. I know that we barely know each other, so you have no way
to know if I do know what I want for myself, but I do. I didn’t think it was
this. I wasn’t looking. I didn’t want to find someone. I was happy
pretending I was happy, but I wasn’t. At least not in that part of my life. I
was empty. Alone. I thought that’s how I should be. I want it to be that way
because it’s easier. It’s easier because you can keep yourself from getting
hurt. I don’t have to worry about someone finding out. It might be easier,
but it’s not right. I can’t stop thinking about you. I couldn’t, even before I
found out that you were…that you…the other day in the truck…”
“You’re still my boss,” Romi whispered.
What was she saying? She should just tell Kiera that it couldn’t happen
because what she’d just stood there and said was all true. That it sucked
getting hurt. It sucked putting yourself out there and being the one to lose.
Constantly. She was trying to be happy on her own. But Kiera also said that
she couldn’t stop thinking about her. And that was also true. Romi hadn’t
been able to just shut off what she felt, even if she shouldn’t be feeling it at