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CHAPTER21
Elena
Istare in the mirror at the word carved into my stomach. It’s starting to change. The lines that were once red are now a jagged purple. Gemma told me that in time, they will come to be white, less noticeable on my skin. But even then, they will never fade completely. What Michael did to me will be embedded in my body for the rest of my life. I swallow down the nausea that climbs in my throat. I don't regret what I did. My sister spent three weeks in the hospital and had to have two operations to relieve the bleeding in her brain from what that bastard did to her. The whole thing caused the shit storm between my father and Frank Maloney. The London Mayor vowed to get revenge for his son's death at the hands of Kane. He plans to bring down the weight of the city officials on the Fraser family, but we are not weak and without allies. My father, for all his faults, lost his mind when he saw the damage that prick did to me and to Letta. I don't know what made him care, but it didn't matter. He agreed to stand with Kane and his family against the might of a politician determined to end everything we stand for. He can’t prove Kane was behind the murder of his son. But Maloney wasn't a fool. He knew exactly who did it and he knew why.
Movement in the mirror has my eyes snapping upwards in time to see Kane step into the doorway. Since I got home from the hospital, he has been so attentive, seen to my every need. It has been wonderful, but we haven't addressed the elephant in the room. The argument we were having before I was brutally attacked.
“I spoke to a tattoo artist. Someone Bailey knows from the links to the Sons.”
“About what?”
“He can cover your scars once they are a little more healed, if you want him to.”
My heart swells that he even asked this. I have tried not to care about the marks engraved in my skin, tried not to be self-conscious about them, but it has not been easy. They are a constant reminder of the torture I suffered at the hands of my brother-in-law. My attack had been personal. He couldn’t let go of the fact I had cut him after hurting my sister. That rage festered like an open pustule, until finally it had exploded. When I came to the house, I was walking right into a trap. He knew I would come. Had bragged to Letta I would. She tried to warn me to stay away on the call, but I didn't understand her veiled warning.
Kane has not forgiven himself for not answering my call. Nor has my brother. If Kane hadn't killed Michael, Dex would have done. The fury in his gaze when he had come to the hospital and seen the extent of the damages to both of his sisters had been immeasurable. For all his faults, and he has many, my brother has always loved me and Letta.
I pull my vest top down, hiding my scars from him. In the month since I've been home from the hospital, I have not let him near me. I don't want that word between us when we are making love.
He crosses the room and grabs my hand. “Don't hide from me.”
I pull away and move to another part of the dresser, pretending to rifle through the drawers for something. “I'm not.”
“That's exactly what you're doing. I've given you space, Elena, but I’ll not allow you to pull away from me and shut me out of your life. You are my wife, and I don't care that you are scarred. It doesn't change anything.”
I turn to face him, not wanting to have this altercation, but knowing it needs to happen and that it is only a matter of time before it does. I rip the plaster off quickly, feeling the sting as it tears at my skin. “Before… this happened, we were arguing. I hurt you and you were mad at what I did. Rightfully so. Just because I was injured, it doesn't mean that disappears. You can't just pretend it didn't happen.”
“Elena, I don't give a fuck about the fact you contemplated for all of about five fucking minutes snooping around my business. I could have lost you. Another five minutes, ten, I'd have been burying you. When I got there, that cunt was heating up something to sear your skin. He would have caused untold damage to you because I ignored your call. You came to me for help, and I didn't pick up because of some stupid spat we were having.” He sinks onto the edge of the bed, and I watch as his shoulders tighten. “You didn't spy on me. And even if you had, you wouldn't have found anything out. You could go through every room in this house and still find nothing. Your father is a dick for putting you in this position, for putting you in danger. Because he had to know what could happen if you were caught, and he didn't care.”
“But the trust between us...”
“Loyalty has to be earned. I think I've started to do that with you.”
I swallow down the lump in my throat. Because I am loyal to him. For the first time in my life, someone puts me before themselves. I have never had that before. My father only wanted me for what I could give him. My sister, although I love her, never had the strength to put herself in front of me, and my brother is so wrapped up in his own life he never stops to think about me. Kane is the first person who puts my comfort before his own.
So yes, piece by piece, day by day, he has earned loyalty from me. Betraying him is never going to be an option because, truth be told, I love him.
“I love you,” I say the words softly, but it carries across the room because the next thing I know he is standing in front of me, his big hands cupping my face as he brings my mouth to meet his. The kiss is not gentle but filled with needy desire. Like a man possessed, he takes control of my body, pushing my top up my belly so he can drag it over my head. Instinctively, I want to push him away, but I ignore that voice in the back of my head and focus on him instead. He needs this as much as I do. I have craved his touch over the last month, wanted it more than I can put into words, but there's always been that niggling shame in the back of my mind that I am changed, that I am marred by the marks that cover my body.
His fingers go between our bodies as he undoes my jeans and shoves them down my legs. I step out of them before he hoists me into his arms. My ankles cross behind his back as he carries me to the bed and slowly lays me back on the mattress. I watch him straighten and remove his own clothes, first his shirt, then his trousers and shoes. He slides his boxers down his legs, leaving his thick cock protruding from a thatch of dark hair between his legs. He climbs over me, pulling my knickers down my legs and off my feet even as I reach behind me to unclasp my bra.
He pauses over me, not moving for a moment. Then his fingers trail over my stomach. I shiver, trembling as he touches the scars that are a constant reminder of my past. He doesn't shy away or contort his face in disgust. Instead, he presses a kiss just above my belly button. I close my eyes, realising how much I have missed his touch. How much I have missed him. I will spend my entire life showing him I am his completely and that he is my only priority. Because I am loyal. I never thought I would be able to say that, that I would align myself with the Fraser family.
But they are my blood now. Kane's brothers and his sister were nothing short of amazing in the aftermath of my attack. They rallied in a way I have never experienced before. Even my sisters-in-law came to see me every day while I was in the hospital to make sure I was okay, and that Kane wasn't driving me too crazy.
And despite what happened to me, despite the nightmares that chase my sleeping moments, I feel happier than I have ever felt at any point in my life. I have a husband who loves me, and extended family who are devoted to me, and my sister is free from a monster. Kane brought her here to live with us, giving her one of the spare bedrooms on the second floor of the house. I was most grateful for that. Because my sister is damaged by what she went through, and she needs the support. Had she gone back to my father he would have had her back on the marriage market within a week. Kane knew it was important to me, so without even asking he took care of the things that matter to me.
That is why I love him. Because he has selflessly taken care of me in ways I didn't even know I needed taking care of.
My thoughts scatter as his tongue slides between my folds, finding my clit. He circles around it, making my hips lift off the bed. It takes everything I have not come there and then. I don't want this over too fast, and by the languid way he is lapping it me, neither does he.
I grip the sheets, fisting them between my fingers as tingles erupt through my pelvis. I can feel my climax building as he continues to worship my body. He moves to using his fingers as well as his talented tongue, and he keeps one hand pressed against my stomach, over the scars that I let push us apart.
I come embarrassingly fast, unable to stop myself from falling over the edge. Four weeks of not being touched makes me needy, so as he hugs his fingers deep inside me, I contract around him. He pulls out, and I feel his engorged cock at my entrance. I expect him to push straight inside me, but instead he leans down and presses his mouth to mine. It’s a kiss meant to convey things he cannot say with words. That he loves me, just as much as I love him.
Then he pushes forward, filling me with his thick cock. With everything that happened, Charlotte got her wish. I never got back to the doctor to get my birth control, so Kane riding me bare is a risk. The thought of being pregnant doesn't scare me though, because although Kane and I have only been in this marriage for a short time, I know it is forever.
“Mine,” he growls in my ear as he slides in and out of my pussy. All I can hear is my heavy breathing as I try to control the sensations washing through me. “This pussy is mine,” he tells me.
“It's yours,” I agree. Because he does own me. Body and heart, I belong to Kane Fraser. My lover. My life. And my husband.
