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I have no idea how we are supposed to act now. Do I ignore it? Pretend it never happened? He hasn’t mentioned it, so I wonder if he regrets what he did.
The balcony door opens, and he steps out, clutching two mugs in one hand. He gives one to me before taking the seat opposite me and sliding his cup on the table.
The coffee in the mug is strong and hot. I wrap my hands around the ceramic, trying to warm them.
We’re high up, the street below looking tiny, so I’m not scared of being seen or attacked here. This small area is probably the only freedom I’ll have for a while.
“You’ve been out here a while,” he says after a moment of silence.
“I was thinking,” I admit.
“That sounds dangerous.”
I snort at his joke, then become serious. “What happened between us… was that a one off?”
“I don’t want it to be,” he says.
“I don’t either,” I whisper back, my heart leaping in my throat. “So, what do we do now?”
“You drink your coffee.” I’m a little disappointed by his answer, which makes him smile. “I’m not going to deflower you on the balcony.”
I arch a brow. “Deflower? What is this, the thirteen hundreds?”
“I respect you,” he says, as if that explains everything.
“I respect you too.”
He doesn’t elaborate on what that means; he just picks his mug up and takes a sip of his coffee.
“Ryan? What if I want you to deflower me?” I wrinkle my nose at that word.
“We don’t have to rush anything,” he says, but he’s wrong. My life could change in a heartbeat. I don’t want to have regrets.
I don’t want my first time to be with someone I’ve not chosen either.
The look on my face has him standing and moving behind me. He places his hands on my shoulders, rubbing gently. I close my eyes, enjoying the sensation of his touch.
“You’re going to have choices, Lia.”
“My choice is you,” I tell him.
I twist so I can look at him over my shoulder. He looks so torn, and I understand why. What we’re doing is risky, dangerous, but I don’t care in this moment. I just want him to kiss me again.
“I shouldn’t have touched you,” he says.
My heart pulses, making my breath lodge in my chest. “Do you regret it?”
“No,” he says instantly, which makes me feel a little better. “But it’s a betrayal of Zeke’s trust to touch you. I respect your brother.”
I turn in the seat, so I’m facing him. “No one is ever going to doubt your respect, Ryan.”
His eyes crawl over my face. “You’re so fucking beautiful,” he says in a soft voice.
Pleasure spreads through me at his words. I can’t deny I like the compliment. “Kiss me,” I order.
He hesitates for a brief moment, then he curses under his breath. His head descends, claiming my lips. It’s a gentle kiss, one that makes my toes curl and my blood pump around my body. His mouth brushes over mine over and over until my lips feel swollen and I’m itching with need. I want him to dive between my legs again, but he just continues to kiss me.
His fingers tangle in my hair and my scalp feels tingly as he pulls my head back to deepen the kiss. I press my thighs together as my pussy starts to pulse and wetness starts to gather between my legs.
