AllFreeNovel
Share Us
I can’t be just like Marnix. I’m better than that. I can’t push him away, tell him no, then rush right back to him. Whatever is happening between us is chaotic, but I can’t let it control me.
It has the potential to be something—something Mariana can clearly see—but not when we’re both like this. Our communication sucks. Our stubbornness drives us, and we’re both too bullheaded to see past our own issues. Until we can put that aside, him and I can’t explore this weird connection we have.
It would be too painful.
Instead of going to Marnix like I’d anticipated, I decide a swim is exactly what I need right now. Mariana’s words are floating around in my head, and I know I’ll let everything get to me if I go see him right now.
I turn around, moving toward the back door to the pool. Looking over my shoulder, I don’t see anyone out here. I need to work out my frustrations and desires and a nice swim might do just that.
I take off my tank top and shorts, leaving me in my bra and panties. Though I don’t really want to ruin my good bra, so I just take everything off, leaving me naked as the day I was born. I’ve always wanted to go skinny dipping—I might as well do it while I have a private pool all to myself.
Not wasting any time, I plunge right into the deep water. My body instantly cools down, letting go of the fire running through my veins. I hold myself under, pushing away the outside world.
Down here, nothing can reach me.
Not Marnix.
Not Cohutta.
Not Rush.
Not even Zayan.
This past week has been messy. Hell, the entire time I’ve been with Marnix has been a hot mess. Now I’m ruining his friendship with Cohutta. I haven’t seen them together at all this past week. Trust me, I’ve been watching. I might have been avoiding them, but I still wanted to see them together at least.
The little I've seen of Cohutta reminds me it’s my fault. I can tell he’s someone who craves human contact. Always needing to be around people, so I’m sure he’s feeling empty and alone right now.
I miss seeing his smiling face, hearing his crazy-ass jokes. I can tell he hides his pain behind humor, but I think that’s what draws me to him even more. He does the same thing that I do—hide behind a mask—and I connect to that. I see that, recognize it, and I want to break through it.
I need him to know I see what’s really underneath. That I’m here for him when he needs me.
What the hell is happening to me? I’ve been so used to pushing my feelings away ever since Zayan destroyed me, but it seems lately all I can do is let emotions seep through me until they’re all I can focus on.
The burn tingling through my lungs forces me to the surface. I gasp for air before flipping over to float on my back. My hair fans around me as I stare up into the dark sky, examining each of the stars. The only thing I can hear is my breathing.
This is exactly what I needed. Tranquility at its finest.
Unfortunately, the peace doesn’t last long. A loud cough pulls me from my thoughts. Twisting my head, I see a large, imposing figure standing by the edge of the pool. Rush looks down at me with curious eyes, probably trying to figure out what I’m doing.
“Care for a swim?” I move to wade through the water closer to him.
“What are you doing?” he asks, like it’s not obvious.
“So this thing is called a pool, and one usually swims in it,” I joke, but his handsome face still looks rigid. His gaze darts around, like he’s expecting someone else to be here. I highly doubt Marnix or Cohutta are going to bother me right now. I’m sure Marnix doesn’t want to see me after I ran off—leaving him with a painful boner—and who knows where Cohutta even is, so I’m sure he won’t be joining.
“You should get out and get back upstairs.” Something has Rush in a mood tonight. His voice lacks any tenderness, replaced by a gruff, cold tone instead. I know he just woke up, but damn.
I realize he’s just going to stand there until I get out, so I do exactly what he says. Moving toward the shallow end where I can finally touch the bottom, I walk out of the water toward him in my naked glory, my tits bouncing with each step.
There’s no point in trying to cover myself up. I’ve got no shame, and he’s the one who told me to get out so I’m not sure what he expected. His eyes bug out as they slowly peruse my body, taking in every inch of my soaked skin as beads of water roll off me.
“Got a towel or are you planning on drying me off with the fire in your eyes?” I shouldn’t be fucking with him since something’s clearly going on with him, but it’s so hard not to. He’s making it pretty easy, considering the way he hasn’t taken his eyes off me, and I can already see the bulge growing in his pants.
“Uh…” He nervously scratches behind his neck before turning around to move toward the built-in towel cabinet next to the outside bar. Coming back, he hands me a towel with an outstretched arm. “Here.”
“Thanks.” I wrap the towel around my body, drying off. I move to where I left my clothes and drop the towel, hearing Rush’s breath hitch as I get dressed. I don’t bother with my bra, only slipping my tank top on along with my panties and shorts. After getting my clothes on, I turn to face him. “So what are you doing out here?”
“I woke up and saw some movement in the pool. Had to make sure there wasn’t a security breach,” he says, all business-like.
