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“Load your ships and sail home, Zarrah, because no one can accuse you of wrongdoing. The Empress’s spies will have seen that Vencia remained too strongly defended for you to attack. As for you coming to Southwatch, given my father is about to gain uncontested control of the bridge, the Empress is going to look the fool for not doing more to stop him. At leastyoutried.”
The look she gave him made Keris feel sick, but he pressed forward. “Regain her favor and secure your position as heir. Become Empress. Do all the good you dreamed of doing. I’ll do the same and…” He trailed off, because the horror in her eyes had disappeared, and in its place was fury.
“Aren trusted me,” she said between her teeth. “And I trustedyou.Instead of honoring that trust, you betrayed me.”
“I didn’t betray you.” He’d known she’d react like this. Known she’d be angry. “I—”
“Protected me? Saved my life?” Tears streamed down her face, and he took a step toward her, but she held up a hand. “Don’t. I love you, Keris. God help me, I do. But right now, I also hate you because youareyour father’s son. You will have things your way no matter the cost.”
It’s worth it,he told himself even as her words cut deep.She’s alive and will remain alive, so it’s worth this pain.
But ithurtto hear the accusation from her.Like a knife to the heart, as the truth so often was. Yet he wouldn’t take his actions back. Refused to be sorry, because Zarrah wouldlive.“Maridrina, Valcotta, Ithicana… someone had to lose, Zarrah. Having everyone come out of this unscathed was never an option. I tried to convince my father to walk away, but it was never going to happen, so I had to choose.” His voice shook. “We could change our world, Zarrah. Create a peace between two nations who’ve been at war for generations. Save thousands of our people’s lives. But that doesn’t come without sacrifice, and that sacrifice is Ithicana.”
Zarrah dropped to her knees, pressing her forehead to the dirt, but when he stepped toward her, she lifted her face. “Don’t you dare come closer.”
“Zarrah.” He hated that he had caused her this grief. He wished that there was a way to erase her pain.
But he refused to regret what he’d done.
“You say you did it for our kingdoms, but that isn’t it, is it?” she sobbed. “You did it for me. To save me. Admit it!”
“Zarrah—”
“Admit it!” The screamed words were punctuated by a sudden crack of thunder, the wind gusting over them.
He felt strangled, unable to speak. But he managed to get out, “I couldn’t…”Lose you,was what Keris had intended to say, but he’d known that in doing this, he’d lose her to hate. “I couldn’t let you die.”
“But now I have to live knowing that my life came at the expense of hundreds. Thousands!” She sobbed the words, shoulders trembling. “And there’s nothing I can do to change that.”
I don’t regret it,Keris silently chanted. “If there’d been another way, I’d have taken it. I don’t want Ithicana to fall. I don’t want people to die, but too many wanted war for a battle to be avoided.”
“There was another way—my way! But you didn’t like my choice, so you took it away.” Zarrah scrubbed the tears from her face, then met his gaze. “I will never forgive you for that, Keris Veliant. I never want to see your face again. Never want to hear your voice. And if we cross paths, Iwillkill you.”
His skin felt like ice, his stomach hollow.I don’t regret it. I…The voice in his head faltered.
“I’m leaving.” She straightened. “But not to go goddamned south. I’m going to try to help Ithicana.”
His eyes snapped to the storm racing in from the east, the clouds dark as midnight but for the constant bursts of lightning branching through them. Not a squall, but one of the Tempest Seas’ legendary typhoons. A ship killer. And it was racing west faster than any ship could sail. “No, Zarrah. You can’t—the storm.”
“I’m going to Aren’s aid, Keris. And this time, you can’t stop me.” Zarrah twisted away, striding toward the path.
She was going to get herself killed. After everything that had happened, after every sacrifice that had been made, she was going to get herself killed. Which meant it had all been fornothing.
Keris broke into a sprint after her, desperately reaching for her arm even as he hunted for words that would change her mind.
But Zarrah whirled, staff in hand, the tip flying toward him.
And then all he saw was darkness.
85
ZARRAH
“The storm is headed straight for Eranahl,” the captain shouted over the violent winds and surf. “Even if the battle still rages, it won’t for long—this storm will put every ship it catches below the sea! We must turn south and attempt to get out of its path!”
“No!” She screamed the word in defiance. Not at the captain or the storm, but at Keris.
Keris, whom she’d left unconscious and bleeding and alone on Southwatch Island. Keris, who had betrayed her trust. Keris, who had condemned Ithicana to save her.
