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Chapter Thirty-Three
Gina
Afew weeks ago, a letter arrived in the mail. The envelope was plain, but the type was neat, the words flowing over the page like a river. The letters were explicit, filled with graphic detail that left me hot and bothered. Soon after, I met Joel at the Franklin Chamber of Commerce dance. It all started with a letter. Then more letters.
I asked Joel somewhere between Tennessee and Texas if he’d been the one to write the letters I kept under my mattress, letters that are now tucked neatly in my suitcase. “Which letters?” he said.
“They’re so erotic,” I said, massaging his thigh. “I can’t get enough of them.”
“Oh,” he told me with a closed smile. “Those.”
He looked like he didn’t want to discuss the matter any further, but we were waiting for Daddy to come back from the men’s room at any moment, so it’s not like we had a lot of privacy or time. Plus, he was a little annoyed that we had to stop again. “You wrote them, right?”
Joel was staring out the driver’s side window at this point. “What?” he asked when I nudged his shoulder.
“The letters?”
“Oh, right.” He looked over at me and nodded. “Yeah, of course.”
Maybe he didn’t actually write them, but I have a hard time believing he’d lie. Either way, it doesn’t matter. Here we are. Getting married on a Tuesday, just before Christmas, in front of Joel's lake house. It’s just the two of us, plus the pastor and Daddy, and Mona, who insisted on making a quick jaunt down. Daddy insists on heading back to Tennessee with her in a couple of days. Whether I’ll stay or go has yet to be decided.
We haven't quite worked out all the details about how I'm supposed to be in two places at once, taking care of my dad and my new husband, but I have faith that it will all work itself out.
My father is doing remarkably well here, better than I’ve seen him in a long while. The weather is warmer in Texas than it is in Tennessee, and I think that has something to do with it.
All that aside, it’s been an interesting few days. Joel and I agreed we would sleep together before we took any vows, before we made any promises of forever. That part wasn’t hard. It practically took care of itself. After Joel dealt with his emergency at work, he became distant. Quiet. I think he was just tired, and maybe like a lot of men, getting cold feet.
I was not deterred. I have learned his ways. I have become a curious student in all things Joel Miller. We had barely made it past the Tennessee state line before I determined this is just the kind of man he is. Mercurial.
So, when he goes silent the day we arrive, I don’t take it personally. His moods are not a problem. This much we have in common. He’ll see once I’m no longer on my best behavior. Once he gives me a reason. He’s going to learn if he can dish it, he can take it.
But back to the sex. The easy part. It gave me great satisfaction that it happened in the truck my father likes to complain about. The morning after we arrived in Pine Lake, Joel woke me up well before sunrise. He wanted to get to the courthouse early; he said he had a full day's work ahead of him. He was freshly showered and dressed. He looked like he hadn't slept.
“Nerves?” I asked.
“What?”
“Are you nervous?”
“Me? No.” He shakes his head. “Why?”
“You look terrible. I thought you might be getting cold feet.”
“No. My feet are pretty warm, actually. I just have a lot on my mind.” He offered a tight smile. “I thought I’d have a chance to get things in order before we married—before I brought you home. I wanted it to be perfect. But here you are.”
He said it like I’m some puppy he’s adopted, and I found it sort of amusing. It also made me miss Annie all the more. Mona found homes for her puppies, except for Blue. I was hoping the two of them could join us in Texas soon, but first things first. I pulled Joel halfway on top of me. “Here I am.”
He glanced toward the bedroom where my father was sleeping. I’d taken the couch. “We’d better hurry,” he said. “I packed breakfast and coffee. It's waiting in the truck.”
I threw on a dress that was hardly warm enough for the occasion, and we drove out to some old farm road and watched the sun come up. It was cold, but Joel had brought blankets. I swear, he thought of everything.
“I don't know if I should have brought you here,” he said.
I assumed he was talking about the country road, the sunrise, and his truck. “What do you mean?”
“Pine Lake is a small place. I’m not sure you'll be happy here.”
I could feel a sadness in him I hadn't sensed before. It was like a weight, a burden he was carrying. “Of course I will. Why wouldn’t I? I have you.”
