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Wiping away happy tears I give her a grin. “Fuck yeah, I do.”
“Another reason why you’re loveable, because you never say no.”
Oh boy. She has no idea how right she is about that. I wish I could tell her about what I did with both Carter and Presley last night but it was such an intimate and private moment that I don’t want anybody on the outside judging it. It was for us, only us.
“So, what are we doing?”
“Stalking Mr. Owen.”
“That weird-ass math tutor?” I ask and she gets this dreamy look in her eyes. “Oh man… really.”
“I want to know where he lives, where he goes, what he buys, what he wears in his spare time.”
“If he ends up in pieces in the Mississippi River a month from now, I am not defending you.”
She just gives another dreamy sigh. “I think I love him.”
“Sure.” I pat her head even though she’s taller than me.
Presley: So… when are you going to call?
Carter: Did you choose Presley? Is that why you’re not replying to my messages.
Scandal: Can we all meet in the barn?
Presley: You made your choice?
Carter: Right now?
Scandal: I’m on my way there now. I’ll see you soon.
It’s getting dark when I arrive and truth be told I am exhausted after a really long Sunday.
I ditch my bike beside Carter’s car and climb the fence. Then I drop to the other side and make my way to the barn with my hands tucked into my pockets.
It’s lit and music is playing and when I enter I find the smiling friends dancing together like they used to. I watch them for a while, sinking my teeth into my lip while smiling so big it hurts. They’re both so sexy and powerful and entirely incredible. And they both want to date me.
Carter catches sight of me during a spin and his blinding smile mirrors my own.
“Hey, beautiful,” he says and comes my way.
I pull the door shut and accept his embrace, laughing when Presley joins in, sandwiching me between them. It reminds me of what Alice said the first time we met about being the stuffing in their sandwich. I’m lucky enough to play out that dream as my reality.
“I’m all sweaty and gross,” I mumble, squeezing free and kicking off my sneakers so I can dance. “Can we practice our routine?”
“Can’t we talk first?”
“We need to know,” Carter presses and I sigh heavily.
“You’re not going to like my answer,” I utter.
“Me?” they both chorus and point at themselves. “Him?” they chorus again and point at each other.
“What did I tell you about talking at the same time?” I laugh but then sober because this is a sad moment. I turn and then turn back, trying to decide the best way to go about this. I had it all planned out in my head. “Guys… I… I had a pretty shit life.”
“We know,” Presley utters, sounding sad.
“And because of that, when two of the most amazing guys came into it, on top of everything going on, my normally sheltered heart cracked wide open and stuffed you both inside.”
They stand and wait patiently.
“This isn’t… I’ve never had to explain my feelings to anybody but a shrink before.” I laugh once and grip my head. “This sucks; it’s hard.”
“Just tell us a name, no hard feelings.” Carter steps forward, offering me his hand. “We’ll all still stay friends; we’ll still dance together.”
“That’s a relief, because… well… I love both of you,” I finally admit but no metaphorical weight feels as though it has lifted. In fact it feels heavier than before. “So I’m breaking up with both of you.”
“What?” Presley demands and they look at each other, confused, and then at me.
“You’re kidding…”
“I wish I cared for one of you more than the other but you’re both incredible and it would break me to see one of you hurt because of my decision. So I’m cutting this off and we’re hopefully going to move on as friends.” I suck on my lower lip as I gauge their blank faces. “I only ask that if you start sleeping around, you try to at least keep it hidden from me. I don’t think I could handle it.”
“But… this isn’t fair.” Presley steps forward, irate. “What’s the point in having none of us? At least one of us will be happy.”
“Will you?” I look at Carter and ask, “Will you be happy if I choose Presley?”
“I’d be devastated,” he admits on a low, quiet mumble.
I look at Presley. “Will you be happy if I choose Carter?”
He pushes his hair back and laughs sardonically. “Great, just great.”
“He was really sure you were going to pick him,” Carter explains.
“Fuck off.” Presley glowers at him and turns towards the door, but then he spins on me, eyes angry and guarded. “You know you’re not the only one who’s had a shit life. I don’t find it easy to love either. Why didn’t you walk away sooner?”
