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I place my jewelry box in my suitcase and zip it up.
“I can’t let you leave, Scandal,” Stanley insists. “I’m not letting you go again.”
“You didn’t let me go the first time, you fucking forced me to go.” I think back to that day and try to recall something. “Did you even hug me goodbye?”
His silence is everything.
“You’re a bad person, and no amount of raising somebody else’s kid is going to redeem you after what you did to me. Now move out of my fucking way.” They still don’t move. “You can’t watch me every second of every fucking day. I’ll go eventually. Why delay the inevitable?”
“And where will you go? What do you have out there?” Stanley asks, further digging the knife in. “Please just stay another week, think about what you’re doing.”
I move to the window and push it open, grab my suitcase, and peer down at the flowerbeds below.
“If you don’t let me leave, I’m going out the window. If you lock it, I’ll smash it.”
He finally steps to the side and so does Lane and they watch me drag my suitcase out of there.
I pass Presley who is sitting in his old room, which is now Paisley’s room, on the soft pink rug playing with dolls. He stands when he sees me and I stop and look him in the eye.
“I told you I loved you,” I say to him and he nods. “And you never said it back. You just abandoned me like everyone else.”
I keep going until I hit the stairs and drag my heavy suitcase down them.
I don’t know where I’m going, or how I’m getting there. I have too much stuff, I need to condense it all into a backpack but I don’t have a backpack either.
Carter is still parked at the end of the drive, leaning against his car with his hands tucked into his pants. He hears me approach and looks up.
No words come from his lips as he takes my suitcase. Presley says nothing as he guides me to the car. And neither whisper a thing as Presley buckles me in, places his hand on my thigh, and Carter starts to drive.
In a daze I find myself crawling into Presley’s bed after he helps me out of my sneakers. I can hear them whispering but they don’t talk directly to me, not until Carter sits beside me and places his hand on my bare arm.
“Are you thirsty?”
I think I might be but I can’t be sure.
I start to tremble, I’m not even sure that I’m cold.
“Can we just pretend that we didn’t fuck up everything between us, and can you both just lie with me,” I whisper pleadingly, my eyes closed so I don’t have to see their rejection.
No time passes when I hear zippers being unzipped and shoes being dropped. The bed dips on both sides of my body and they both climb in on either side of me. Presley pulls me into his T-shirt-clad chest and brings us forehead to forehead. I lock my thigh between his. He must have taken his jeans off so I wouldn’t be uncomfortable.
Carter presses against my back and holds my arm and shoulder as he places a gentle kiss on my neck.
I release a staggered breath and start crying again.
“It’s so unfair,” I whisper and Presley kisses my lips. “It’s so unfair.”
“People are dicks,” Carter breathes against my skin.
“Us included,” Presley adds.
“I just want to stay like this forever with both of you. I don’t want to leave this moment.”
I think I fall asleep for a while because the world goes dark, and when I wake up, Carter isn’t in bed with me anymore but Presley is. I can hear Carter somewhere outside the room, talking on the phone I think. I can hear his voice but nobody else’s.
I blink open my stinging eyes and Presley smiles at me and cups my cheek with his hand.
“I love you too,” he speaks so softly I hardly hear it. “You have me. Always. No more running. No more being a dick.”
The foundations for a fixing heart set in place as I stare into his light eyes that look more blue than gray today and see his feelings just as he said. There’s no lie there. He loves me too, but then I always knew he did.
I kiss him, softer than I ever have. I kiss him and taste him. I need him.
My hands go under his shirt and feel his muscles and chest, they quiver under my touch. His hands explore mine too, also digging in with just the right amount of pressure.
“I need you,” I breathe pleadingly and I see him hesitate. “Please.” I crush my lips to his. “I need you.”
He groans when I grasp his hardness over his boxers, he shudders when I yank them down.
