AllFreeNovel
Share Us
“Yeah, no worries.” She smiled.
She’d given me a lot to think about. Namely, the prospect of experimenting with someone so I could see how I felt. The only problem was that I didn’t want to just experiment with anyone… unless that person turned out to be Brianne. And it wouldn’t be fair to treat her as some kind of experiment if I actually wanted to be friends with her. I knew I’d be able to find a hookup if I wanted—especially since Brianne said I was good-looking, a thought that brought warmth to my heart—but random people didn’t interest me.
After finishing my drink, I went up to my room. The smallness was oppressive, now. I had a sort of restlessness inside me that was making me not want to be cooped up here.
I decided to text Brianne and tell her I was sorry for how I behaved and that I wanted to see her again. I figured if I reached out then maybe she’d feel better about it.
> MARGIE: Hey, sorry I stomped off like that. I was upset. I’d like to hang out again soon.
I tried to get some work done, but it was difficult. I just found myself sitting and waiting for Brianne to reply. Dinner time came and went without a reply, and just when I was going to turn in for the night and watch Netflix, my phone pinged.
> BRIANNE: I was at practice so sorry I didn’t reply sooner. Let’s hang out this weekend!
I finally felt like I could breathe a sigh of relief. She wasn’t mad at me. Not that I thought she would be… but it was hard to say with people you didn’t know well. I replied and told her I wasn’t doing anything this weekend—which was true—and her reply came instantly.
> BRIANNE: Cool, I think there’s a party at Miriam’s Friday. I promise she’ll be nice this time.
I wasn’t so sure of that, but if Brianne made a promise, I figured she’d probably talk to Miriam. I didn’t really like the idea of her telling them not to make fun of me, as if I was a child who needed to be taken care of, and I didn’t like that she still hung out with them, but I was willing to give her a chance anyway. She seemed like a good person.
But what the hell was I going to do at a party? I’d been to a few with EAC, but they’d been busts. I just sipped a beer and stood around awkwardly while everyone around me got wasted and danced. I didn’t like getting too drunk or even tipsy around people I didn’t know because I was worried I’d do or say something stupid. But on the other hand, I didn’t like looking like a square because I didn’t get drunk. People were really nice about that here, and didn’t pressure me at all, but I still felt like an outsider when I was the only one who was sober.
I supposed I just had to trust Brianne—a scary thought, trusting someone I didn’t know well—and just go for it. See what a different party scene was like.
And maybe I could get to know Brianne better. Maybe I could even kiss her.
Shit, that thought immediately made me get a little tingly down there. I felt like that should be telling—or maybe my libido was just revving up because I’d ignored it for so long. In any case, it just made me feel uneasier. It was as if my body was trying to show me that I was into women because I’d been entertaining the idea.
If I got excited at the thought of kissing a girl, that had to mean something, right? Especially when kissing guys didn’t always have the same effect on me.
There was no way I was getting anymore work done tonight. I closed my laptop and lay down on my bed, staring at the ceiling. I tried not to think of Brianne and how great it would be if we were actually friends, and I was established in her friend group, but I couldn’t help it. When the one thing I wanted more than anything—a true friend—was within reach, I couldn’t stop my brain and heart from indulging in the possibilities.
BRIANNE
I wasn’t even sure Margie would want to come to the party because Miriam had been snarky toward her, but she’d told me she was down. I’d resolved to make sure no one was a dick to her at this party. I wanted her to feel comfortable.
It was still a little weird to me how protective I was of her. I really wasn’t usually like this. I wondered if I was developing a crush on her, and realized that maybe I was. The thought of seeing her at the party certainly made me feel a little jittery, and that was weird.
I checked myself in the mirror and decided to make my way over, glad that Miriam’s house was within walking distance of mine. I’d spoken to her and told her to be nice to Margie. She’d asked me if I liked liked her, and I told her maybe. Of course, she’d gone nuts with that tease, but she’d agreed to be polite and friendly to her. So that was taken care of, at least.
As I approached her house, I saw that the lights glowed warmly in the windows and the faint sound of music escaped it. I tried the door handle, found it was open, and walked inside. The music was blaring loudly, and my friends were drinking in the kitchen.
“Hey,” said Miriam. “Glad you could make it. Where’s your new girl?”
“Brianne has a new girl?” Siobhan perked up.
Suddenly, all the attention was on me. “She’s not my new girl,” I scoffed. “She’s just a new friend. Yeah, she’s cute as hell, but she’s also straight.”
“Oh, bummer,” said Miriam.
“Yeah. Oh well. She should turn up soon.”
“I think there’s probably more to it,” said Kaitlyn. “I mean, you don’t just adopt random straight girls normally, do you?”
“Er, no,” I said, trying to fend off the blush rising on my cheeks. “Margie just seems like a nice girl who needs friends.”
“Sure,” said Miriam, skeptical.
Whatever, they’d see that she really was just a friend. Of course, I wanted her to be something more, but I’d accepted that wasn’t going to happen. Maybe she could find a cute guy at this party, finally.
