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I don’t care who he is. Whether it’s a shy, quiet nerd who just wants to stay in and put Legos together, or a wild beast who gets a tattoo and fucks me in a public bathroom. I just want him to be happy, and I want him to be happy withme, no matter what that looks like.
Laughter bubbles out of me even while my heart is pounding in my chest the closer I get to him, when I see his tongue sticking out the side of his mouth, really concentrating on getting the head of the penis right, as he carefully hops through the sand.
“It looks like someone has been keeping his artistic creativity a secret.”
Ryan’s head flies up from looking down at his work, his eyes light up, and my favorite smile stretches across his face when he sees me. The one that makes both of his dimples pop and uses every muscle in his cheeks, the same one I’m rewarded with every day when he gets home from work and bowling.
“You’re here! My favorite person in the whole, wide world!” Ryan’s arms are outstretched as he smiles at me, standing in the sand wearing nothing but a pair of bright-red boxer briefs with purple bowling balls all over them, looking hotter than any other half-naked man currently on this beach.
My feet never stop moving, and I just walk right into him, sliding my arms around his waist, closing my eyes, turning my head, and resting my cheek against his bare chest, listening to the sound of his steady heart beating against my ear as he wraps me up in his arms. Ryan is a hugger. He hugs me every day when he gets home from work, he hugs me when I come back in the house from painting out in the garage, and he hugs me if I just run into my room that I no longer sleep in to grab something, just because he missed me for the twenty seconds I was gone. I have never felt safer, or more cared for, than when I’m in Ryan’s arms, and I never want a day to go by without having them around me.
I don’t know the first thing about love. My mom pops Xanax and drinks red wine all day just so she can continue to pretend my dad hasn’t been fucking his interns for years or using the company credit card to wine and dine whatever woman he meets at the hotel bar when he goes out of town for “business trips.” They haven’t slept in the same bed in ten years, they barely speak to each other, and I have no idea why they’re still married.
Falling in love has always scared me. Putting that much trust in someone else not to hurt you, or break your heart, or lie about out-of-town trips, or why there are flower shop purchases on the credit card statements when he’s never given you flowers a day in your life, is not an easy thing to do. But falling in love with Ryan feels as easy as falling asleep. I just closed my eyes, and it happened.
“I ate a pot cookie. Or three.”
“I figured.” I laugh with my cheek still pressed against his warm chest, while Ryan tightens his arms around me.
“The guys are so cool, and nice, and cool, and they didn’t want me being high alone, so they all ate pot cookies with me in solidarity. Isn’t that cool and nice? They said if I’m going down for indecent exposure, they’re going down with me. We’re gonna be best friends forever.”
Pulling my head back just enough so I can look up at him, my heart races, just like it always does when he looks at me, or smiles at me, or is just in the same damn room as me. Seeing him so happy and free, and not caring in the least that he’s half naked out on a public beach, makes me want to protect him at all costs, so no one ever takes this away from him, and he can be this happy and carefree at all times.
You know, minus all the pot that got him to this point in the first place. And maybe wearing a few more articles of clothing.
“How are you feeling?”
Instead of answering me, Ryan just dips his head and runs his nose against the side of my neck, making me squirm and giggle.
“You smell good,” he speaks softly against my ear. My arms tighten around his waist, and my entire body breaks out in goose bumps when his hips brush against mine, and I can feel how hard he is in those thin, skin-tight boxer briefs. “I want to fuck the hell out of you right on this beach.”
And now I’m seriously reconsidering my stance on having sex on a beach and getting sand in places sand should never go….
“Ohhh, I said that out loud, and we aren’t naked.”
I’m back to laughing again at the shock in Ryan’s quiet voice, as he continues to nuzzle his nose against the side of my neck. One of the things I love most about him is how dirty he gets when we’re having sex…onlywhen we’re having sex. He’s still the same old Ryan who says things likegosh darnitandfreaking heck, and blushes if you even mention something dirty when we’re fully clothed. But when we’re actually having sex, it’s like he can’t hold back, and every dirty thought and word comes flying out of his mouth. It makesmefeel like I’m high every time I’m with him. Hearing him say something so dirty when, like he said, we’re not naked, is quite a shock while also being really hot. And incredibly adorable that he seems to have lost his filter somewhere in the sand with all the penises.
Ryan suddenly jerks his head back from my neck and looks at me seriously. “New plan. We should go home now so I can eat your pussy until you’re screaming my name.”
“Ryan!” I gasp, even as said pussy automatically gets wet at his words, like Pavlov’s dog.
“Atta boy!” Bodhi stumbles past us still cradling Peanut to his chest, with Tess’s arm around his waist, and he gives Ryan a high-five, while I just shake my head at this man who smiles down at me like an adorable, dirty-talking puppy.
“Pot cookies are fun! I’ve never saidpussyout loud before, unless I’m talking about a cat, but it’s weird to call a cat apussywhen the wordcatis right there for the taking. I like your pussy, and it’s not weird at all. It’s warm, and soft, and wet, and I want to stay there forever. You have agreatpussy.”
“You can stop sayingpussynow.” I chuckle, wondering how it’s possible that I’m turned on at this moment.
“I really don’t think I can.” Ryan scrunches up his face in confusion, while I pull out of his arms and hand him his pants.
“I have no idea where your shirt is,” I tell him, laughing when Ryan just tosses his pants back into the sand and then points out to the water.
“It’s out there, sinking deeper into the ocean, just like how I want to sink my cock deep into your pussy, and fuck your brains out, but notactuallyfuck them out, because I like your brains… brainses… brainseses…. Whatever. Fuck, cock, pussy, brain, yay! I love pot cookies!”
He’s like Buddy the Elf discovering New York City for the first time, and I don’t know whether to lock him in a room until this passes and let him do whatever he wants to me, or just let him get it all out of his system right here on the beach. Before I can make up my mind, I let out another loud squeal and a bunch of giggles as Ryan bends his knees and grabs the back of my thighs, scooping me up and against him until I have to wrap my arms around his shoulders and lock my legs around his waist.
“Ifxis the average ofmand 9,yis the average of 2mand 15, andzis the average of 3mand 18—”
“What are you doing?” I interrupt his mumbled whispering as he stares at my mouth. Smiling at him, I try really hard to stop getting turned on with one of Ryan’s hands clutching my ass and the other one traveling up my spine to wrap around the back of my neck.
