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The woman glances up and sees me staring. “Are you here for the marketing job?” she asks.
I nod. “Good luck,” I offer, and she smiles.
“You too. The company sounds cool,” she adds, “but I’m not sure about this Banks guy. I’ve heard he can be kind of tough as a boss.”
“I’ve heard that too,” I agree. “But only because he cares so much about every small detail. His heart’s in the right place.”
“Oh,” she says, confused. “You know him?”
“I did.” I swallow back the pang of aching regret that fills my chest. “And you’d be lucky to know him, too.”
“Jenn?” Asher interrupts us, looking excited. “Austin just finished his call. You can go on through. Good luck!” he adds in a whisper, as I take one last deep breath, steel my nerves, and walk down the hall.
I knock on Austin’s office door, my heart pounding with nerves—and hope.
“Come in.”
He’s rising from his desk with a friendly smile when I walk in, no doubt expecting another applicant. When he sees me, the smile slips.
“Jenn?”
“Hi,” I say brightly, approaching his desk and sticking out my hand to shake. “I’m Jennifer Walker, and I’m here to interview for your head of marketing position.”
Austin just stares at me. “What is this?”
“An interview.” I reply, trying to ignore the wary expression in his eyes. “Here’s my CV, detailing all my relevant experience.” I place a copy on the desk between us, and plant myself in a chair. “You can ask me anything at all. About myself, my work, my life. I promise you, I’ll tell you everything.”
Austin exhales slowly. He doesn’t sit, instead, he circles the desk, and moves to look out the window. “I don’t even know where to start.”
“Start wherever you want,” I insist, my stomach tied up in knots. “I mean it, Austin. I know honesty is everything to you, that’s why I’m here. I have nothing to hide. Ask me anything.”
He turns. “Why did you lie? I don’t mean that first day, when you came for the interview,” he adds, his face stony and impossible to read. “I get it, I was on full charm-offensive trying to talk you into the job. But after that… When we grew closer. There were so many moments you could have been honest, Jenn. That day at the pier. The batting cages. When I met all your friends… You could have just said something. Anything! Then we would have laughed about it, and moved forwards, and I wouldn’t have wound up… ” He trails off, raking a hand through his hair, but I know the rest.
Wound up hurt. Feeling betrayed. Wondering if he ever knew me at all.
My chest aches.
“I know,” I whisper, then try again, stronger. “And I should have told you, I know that now. But at the time… It was just all going so well. I never saw you coming, Austin,” I confess. “I’d always hoped I would meet someone and justknow. Feel this connection, be able to picture our lives together. And then suddenly, it was you.” I look at him, feeling the pull of his presence like gravity, wishing I could wrap my arms around him. “You were the one who made me laugh, and feel desirable, and like I could do anything I set my mind to. And I could make excuses for why I didn’t come clean, about how I didn’t want to distract you from the launch, or screw up the opening, but the truth is…”
I gulp, feeling naked. Vulnerable. But I can’t stop now. I have to go all-in.
“The truth is, I was falling in love with you,” I tell him. “And I was so scared that if I told you about my lie, it would all just disappear.”
There’s silence. Austin doesn’t say a word, and his expression is unreadable.
My heart sinks. I don’t know what I was expecting, but I was hoping maybe my words could cut through his distrust.
I guess I was wrong.
Swallowing back the sting of tears, I get to my feet. “Anyway, I just wanted to tell you that,” I say quietly. “And whatever happens… I’m so proud of you. You’re an amazing guy, and I hope you find everything you want in life.”
I walk slowly out of the office, a part of me still holding out hope that my words my move him in some way. But he doesn’t come after me.
Not in the hallway. Not in the waiting area. Not as I head back downstairs to the spa lobby…
Every step takes me further away from him. From us. But I did it. I made my case. I’m proud of myself for coming back and facing him, but still, I can’t stop the wave of sadness that wraps around me, echoing with loss and regret.
“Jenn!”
