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“I don’t know.” Her shoulders creep up to her ears. “We meet at Northfield Park after work. And it’s late, but he brings blankets and leftover food for a moonlight picnic. And we talk for hours. He’s so sweet and funny. He’s got the best stories. And he really listens to me. Then there’s that accent.”
“Right. He’s dreamy. I get it.” I clear my throat. “So did you have a question for me?”
She takes a breath and squares her shoulders. “His work permit is temporary. Fix got him this job for the summer, but if Clive doesn’t get another one after, he’ll have to leave. And my family is here in Oregon. My life is here. I’m not sure I’d ever want to move out of the country.”
“I’m still not hearing a question.”
“Right.” Her chin crumples. “Do you think I’m crazy, getting involved with someone who I’ll eventually have to say goodbye to? Am I just setting myself up to get really hurt?”
“Huh. That is a big question.” I capture a cube of lasagna in my chopsticks and consider all the years I spent making sure I wouldn’t get hurt by going after the wrong women. Women who couldn’t truly break my heart because my heart wasn’t fully invested. And I didn’t even realize that’s what I was doing. Until Frank pointed it out.
“Any particular reason you’re asking me?” I pop the lasagna in my mouth.
“Because you’ve always been so practical. So logical. You think things through. Likeoverthink things. So I figured you could be objective about whether or not I was making a mistake.”
The cheese and pasta is heavy in my throat. Kind of like the doubt I’ve carried around for a while. I gulp it all down. “Here’s the thing,” I say. “I’ve spent my whole life with a plan. I’m basically what would happen if a spreadsheet and a calendar app had a baby. And I’ve been alone for a long time.”
Kayla blinks. “What’s your point?”
“My point is we can’t protect ourselves from pain forever. Not without closing ourselves off to real happiness too.”
“Is that from a fortune cookie?”
I chuckle. “No, but it should be.” In any case, it’s better thanMeasure Once Cut Twice. OrLooking for Love in All the Wrong Places.Maybe I should get a job writing fortunes. Then again, maybe Tess and I did get our cookies switched that night. For years now, I’ve been seeking relationships that weren’t right for me, and she’s been barreling through life without stopping to weigh the consequences, good or bad.
But together, we balance each other out. Two fortune cookies, one fate.
“So you’re saying I should go for it with Clive?” Kayla asks.
I meet her gaze. “I’m saying sometimes we have to trust our gut and go all in. So what does your gut say?”
“My gut says he’s here for the rest of camp. So why not see where this goes by then?”
“Sounds reasonable.”
“Maybe Clive Pendergast is the love of my life. And if he isn’t, I’ll learn a lot about what I do want in a man.” She glances around and lowers her voice. “Worst case scenario, there’s always Archie.”
“Hey.” I aim my chopsticks at her. “Archie’s a good guy, and a heck of a security guard. He really knows his way around a walkie-talkie. And you’d always be safe with him.”
“You’re right.” Kayla’s lip quirks. “And I was only kidding.”
“Okay.” I nod. “It’s just that a lot of us have been someone’s worst case scenario before. And then one day—out of the blue—you suddenly start thinking you might be the yin to their yang. Anything can happen.”
Kayla snickers. “You sound like a fortune cookie again.”
I smirk. “If this library gig doesn’t work out, at least I’ve got a fallback.”
“So this yang you mentioned.” Her eyes laser in on mine. “It’s Tess, isn’t it? She’s your yang.”
Gah.My chest constricts. “Why would you say that?” Better question: Why didIsay that?
Kayla smiles. “It’s totally obvious you have feelings for each other. But for some reason, you’re both afraid to admit it.”
I wince. “This is me, admitting nothing.”
“You don’t have to. We share a desk. I’ve had a front row seat to The Spencer Show since the day I got hired, so I can tell when you’re happy by now. Or frustrated. Or excited. And I candefinitelytell when you’re crushing on someone. And it was never me,” she says. “As much as Tess tried to claim otherwise.”
I shove my glasses higher up on my nose. “I have been told a time or two that I wear my heart on my sleeve.”
