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Big Mama(to my mom, Remy): How old is Daisy now? Is she four? I can’t remember.
Mom, Mac, Darby, Olivia, Brooke, Me: She’s seven.
Daisy:I’m seven.
Big Mama:Oh.Hello, Seven!
The chat continues like this for the next ten minutes, all of us taking turns being confused about who’s talking to whom, followed by long stretches when everyone gets quiet, waiting for someone to speak. In the past, I’ve filled those silences. That’s always been my role. Bright and bubbly Tess coming along to sprinkle pixie dust on the family.
Today, though, I’m exhausted. And what’s left of my energy has to be saved for Sunny Camp. I can’t worry about making everyone else happy. But as it turns out, when I’m not busy being the group’s comedienne—cracking jokes or being the butt of them—I’m left behind in the conversation. All the questions about work and schedules and goals never get tossed to me. I get asked about aloe vera. And sunburns.
Because I don’t take SPF seriously enough.
Eventually Daisy starts telling us about all the names she’s come up with for the new baby, in alphabetical order, A through Z. It’s borderline maddening and totally hilarious. I’m pretty sure the rest of this chat will feel like eternity.
Remember you love these people, Tess.I rub at my temples. Things get quiet again, then Darby drops a bomb.
Darby:By the way, I’ve got a break before my next term starts, so I’m coming to visit. At the end of next week.
Mom: Hooray! Oh, that’s wonderful news, Darby!
Big Mama: (again to my mom) What did she say, Remy?
Mom: Darby says she’s coming to Abieville, Mama. Turn up your hearing aid.
Darby: Oh, no. I’m sorry, Mom. I meant I’m going to visit Apple Valley.
Mom:
Darby: Since you moved to Abieville, the family always travels there. Liv and I haven’t been back to the Valley in years.
Mom:
Olivia: Then I’m coming, too, otherwise I’ll die of FOMO.
Brooke: That sounds great! You two can stay with us. Your sisters can stay with us, right, Mac?
Mac:
Daisy: All my aunties in Apple Valley! Woo hoo! Dad, can we have a big party here at our house?
Mac:
Me:Oh, wow. Both of you. Coming here at the same time. Yes. Well. (Gulp.) That sounds awesome. (Throat clear.) Unfortunately, I’ll be at camp the whole time. Working. Too bad.
Darby: Don’t worry. We’ll visit you at the ranch.
Olivia:Don’t worry. We’ll bring aloe vera.
Me: You really don’t have to.
Olivia and Darby: But we want to!
My stomach rolls, and I feel a little seasick. Why are my insides churning at the thought of Darb and Liv visiting me at camp? Seeing where I work? Meeting the campers? Working their magic on Spencer while I watch? My extraordinary sisters will be talking to Spencer.
All my aunties in Apple Valley.
Okay. I guess I know why I’m all churn-y, but I really wish I didn’t. This isn’t a part of myself I like very much—the part where I feel a bitless thancompared to my sisters. And it’s not even their fault. Darby and Olivia don’t try to beat me. Not intentionally. Or directly. Ever.
