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No one protested. They all just got up and quietly left the room. Then it was just Nate, my father, and me. The silence hung in the air like a blanket, smothering us. Smothering me.
“Take her back to bed.” My father rushed out of the room.
I stood up and headed back upstairs. I could get to bed on my own, but I heard Nate’s footsteps following me.
I opened my bedroom door but didn’t cut the light on in the room. The golden light from the hallway let a sliver of light in that rested just shy of my bed. I knew where everything was, so the darkness was no big deal. It was welcomed, actually. I wanted to close the door and bask in the darkness, the shadows of the night… where vengeance lived. He was becoming my best friend, someone I could count on.
Nate stood in the doorway as I climbed into the bed and turned to face the wall.
“You have nothing to say?” asked Nate. His voice sounded so small, brimming with worry.
I didn’t answer him. I had nothing to say. Well, no, I had many things to say, but I couldn’t say them. Couldn't articulate them. The words danced around my mind like puzzle pieces trying to fit together. But they didn’t. They made no sense, not to me. I didn’t want to speak.
I was too angry to speak. Too filled with hatred to make the puzzle pieces fit. Too angry to try to figure out the right words to soothe and comfort and reassure the people around me that I was okay.
So, I chose silence.
Chapter 2
Addie
My mind was a tangle of shadows, each one with a face I wanted to forget but forced myself to remember. Faces twisted in anger, satisfaction, pleasure. Faces I wanted to destroy. Eyes I wanted to hold in my hands and squeeze until I felt them burst. Skin I wanted to peel like a potato.
My mind was a building, each room a torture chamber. When I wasn’t sleeping, I would detangle a shadow, usher it into a room and play a game of how many body parts I could remove from him before he died.
The game never lasted long.
A week after the last meeting, another one was called. Again, I sat at the dining room table on the end opposite my father.
“She’s still not talking?” Anthony asked my father.
Nate sighed. “No, but I think her firing at Kent spoke volumes. When she is herself again, finds her voice, you’d all better look out. Because she won’t forget.”
Anthony’s eyebrows rose as he glanced at me, dark gray eyes narrowing, daring me to say something and prove him wrong. When I didn’t, he turned his attention back to my father. “How is she supposed to run the family if she won’t speak?”
“She needs time,” said my father.
“Well then, what are we supposed to do in the meantime?” Anthony hit the table as he rose to his feet. “What about this club she’s wanting to open? What about Lenny and his gang? Are we going after them?”
“Sit down and shut the fuck up!”Padregrowled.
Anthony did as he was told. Good lap dog.
My father and Nate glanced at each other and then Nate looked at me. I didn’t say anything, I just looked at him, trying to keep my face void of any emotion.
“We follow her lead.” Nate nodded, studying me.
“But she’s not saying anything!” Anthony’s voice was so loud it seemed to echo in the room. He turned his attention to me, his face red as he scowled. “Do you plan on voicing any opinions today or any other day?”
My father slammed his fist down onto the table. “I said, shut the fuck up! Get out!”
I looked away and said nothing.
“We follow her lead,” Nate repeated, nodding. “If she says nothing then so do we. We do nothing until she says what her plans are.”
Anthony jumped up, his chair hitting the ground with a loud thud. “This is unacceptable! Just because she was raped doesn’t mean she gets to crawl—”
The look on Nate’s face stopped Anthony cold. He seemed like he was trying to make himself small while Nate had a look on his face that I had never seen before. His eyes were cold, his face red, his eyebrows stitched together in a scowl.
