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I know what I’ve done. I was given a once in a lifetime chance with Jack after all these years and I went and fucked it up.
“He’s not gone,” Ellen says, pulling a slip of paper from her pocket and handing it to me. “This was on the floor by your front door when I came in.”
It’s wrinkled from being shoved in her pocket and as much as I’m pissed at her for keeping it from me, she somehow knew I had to let it all out before I’d be ready to handle what now needs to be said to Jack.
I look down at the note, my eyes welling with tears, tears that I feel should have long since run out, but I let out a deep sigh when I see what Jack has written.
He’s in the one place I should have known to look, the one place I skipped over so quickly because it was far too easy.
And in my frame of mind just a short time ago, thinking he had long since left me, I would never have believed he had made this about me. I looked for him in all the places he loved, all the places I thought he would go. I never once stopped to think he’d be waiting for me in the place I loved.
“I have to go,” I tell Ellen, thanking her for finding the note and being here while I fell apart.
“I know you do and it would be great if you could stop being such a hot mess for just a second.” She shrugs her shoulders and laughs a little at her own joke, making it hard not to laugh along with her.
I practically sprint across the vineyard with everything in me willing Jack to still be where his note said he would be. I have no idea how much time has passed since he left the note, but I’m holding out more hope than I ever have.
I make it there in record time, winded but with my heart racing, and when I round the last row of grapevines and the open field with the rose-covered trellis comes into view, Jack isn’t there.
I practically collapse; barely making it to the swing that hangs from the willow tree. My ass hits the seat and for a split second I laugh out loud. I feel like my life is one of those never-ending TV series where the writers are just making ridiculous shit happen to me just to keep the show going long after it should have ended.
I bury my face in my hands knowing that at some point all my stupid decisions were bound to come back and bite me in the ass.
I guess this is that moment.
I push my feet off the ground sending the swing swaying slightly under my weight, my eyes now closed. And as I rock back and forth shakily on the swing, I swear I hear Jack whistling.
I drag my feet on the ground, stopping the swing along with my breathing, I call out, “Jack!”
And what comes next makes my heart come to a screeching halt in my chest.
“Come find me, Lu!” he yells back and I’m smiling through the tears that fill my eyes.
Fourteen years ago, I chased him through these vines, fourteen years ago he hid from me in a game of tag that left both of us breathless as he raced to the swing.
I leap from the swing, racing down the first row of vines, a smile plastered on my face making my cheeks hurt and as I reach the end of the row, Jack steps out.
I nearly crash into him, our bodies colliding hard as I throw my arms around his neck, jumping to wrap my legs around his waist.
His arms instinctively move to hold me against him, and when our lips connect it’s hard and needy and desperate.
Our kiss saying all the things we should’ve said to each other all those weeks ago, hell all those years ago.
“Jack, I’m so sorry,” I murmur, my forehead resting against his as he slowly releases me from his arms. “I should have told you about Nate, about the wedding, but I was…”
“You don’t need to say anything more,” Jack whispers against my mouth, his lips lightly brushing mine. “I’m so sorry too, Lu. I never meant to keep anything from you either.”
I stand clinging to him, never wanting to let go because it’s taken me fourteen long years to realize this is where I was always supposed to be.
“I gave my heart to you a long time ago and I never got it back. I’ve spent the last fourteen years of my life pretending I didn’t, but nothing compares to what I have with you, Jack.”
“I never wanted to leave you, and I never did. We may have been in different places, but everything in me belonged to you, Lu. Not a day went by that I didn’t think about you,” Jack says, his lips once again covering mine in a needy kiss, a kiss that means more than either of us can ever express. “And it doesn’t matter who came before or after, you have always been mine, and you always will be.”
Despite the fact that it has only been a couple of months, it’s hard to imagine my life without Jack in it. I can’t imagine waking up without him next to me or seeing him as I work through my day at the vineyard, but more than any of this, I can’t even fathom what it will be like without his unwavering support in all that I do.
I never had this with Nate. He didn’t understand my attachment to this place or all the happiness it brings me despite its struggles. He wanted me to leave the only thing that I ever felt understood me. But now I have Jack, and even if we live on different continents and this whole thing might be totally crazy, it somehow works.
“Lu?” Jack says, a shakiness to his voice, a questioning tone that draws my eyes to his. I feel his heartbeat quicken and a moment of silence hangs between us as I slide my hand to his chest, feeling his beating heart.
