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“I know I don’t have to. Is there anything else I can get you while I’m out?”
I nudge Leo’s shoulder and whisper, “Watch this.” I clear my throat. “Actually, would you mind stopping at Barnes and Noble?”
“I can do that. What book do you want?”
“I don’t know. I read romance novels, so just pick out a variety.”
Leo clamps his hand over his mouth as his shoulders shake.
It’s quiet on the line. “James?”
“I’m here. Do you mean, like, the books with Fabio on the cover?”
I bite the inside of my cheek to keep from laughing. “No, but that’s the section you need to go to. I’ll let you pick them out for me. Read the blurbs on the back and pick whatever sounds good to you.”
“I don’t know if I’m the right person for this.”
Leo leans over. “I can make a run if you don’t think you can do it, brother.”
“No, no. It’s fine. I’ll go.”
We say goodbye, and as soon as I end the call, I double over with laughter. “Oh my god. I can’t believe he’s going to do it.”
“Damn, Nixie. I had no idea you were into spicy porn books.” Leo rubs his hands together. “This is going to be fun.”
“They’re not porn books. They just have…”
“Porninthem.”
I shove his shoulder. “Shut up and go make me a sandwich. I’m getting hungry.”
“Yes, ma’am.” Leo salutes me, and then he’s bounding into the hall and down the stairs like a kid.
Maybe he still is a kid. Maybe he’s stuck in the last stages of his life when his mom was still alive. Maybe that’s why we have such a hard time moving on from trauma, because we’re still the same person we were before it happened, only everything around us has changed. Life goes on, but we’re stuck in purgatory, replaying old memories of the good times.
The rest of the afternoon goes by as Leo and I watch old movies in bed. Neither one of us has anywhere to be, and even if he did, I don’t think he’d admit it.
“You know, you’re more like your brother than you think. Have you ever thought about becoming a police officer?”
Leo snorts. “The law isn’t my thing.”
“What about a firefighter? Or an EMT? I can see you helping people.”
“I never really thought about it.” He stares up at the ceiling. “Never saw much of a future for myself.”
A familiar feeling settles into my bones, and I drag my nail over the raised skin on my wrist. “Me either.”
“You’re young. You can still figure it out.” He shrugs. “I guess we both can.”
“Want to hear a secret that I’ve never told anyone before?”
He sits up, eyes wide. “Yes.”
“I think I want to write a book.”
“Like one of your porn books?”
I laugh. “A romance, yes. But a realistic one. Where there’s drama, and heartache, and real-life situations.”
