AllFreeNovel
Share Us
The curtain slides open and closed, and I wait for the sound of their shoes shuffling against the tile to disappear. But then the mattress dips on one side.
I open my eyes to find Phoenix climbing onto the hospital bed.
“What are you doing?”
“I’m staying here with you—and don’t tell me not to because I won’t listen, and you can’t make me because you’re injured and there’s nothing you can do about it.” She moves around the wires I’m hooked up to, and lies down beside me, nuzzling her head into the crook of my neck.
Every muscle in my body relaxes, and I wrap my arms as far around her as the wires will let me. Having her here, feeling her next to me, knowing she’s with me settles my restless soul.
“I know you’re not okay, James,” she whispers against my skin. “And you don’t have to be. I’m here. I’ve got you.”
A tear escapes me as everything surges to the surface, and I don’t move to swipe it away. I don’t have the strength to hide it. Not now, not from her.
I bury my face in her hair. “I tried to stop him.”
I fucking tried.
Phoenix tightens her hold on me. “Some of us can’t be saved, no matter how hard you try.”
Memories of my mother cooking, laughing, dancing, flicker by on a reel through my mind.
I tried.
“It’s not your job to rescue everyone.” Phoenix lifts her face to mine and kisses each tear as it falls. “You can’t bear the weight of that responsibility. All you can do is try. You try, and you help, and you make a difference to so many people. But you can’t save them all.”
I drop my forehead to hers, breathing in a lungful of her sweet scent of lavender and mint.
“You’re in control of you,” she whispers. “Your thoughts, and your choices, and your actions. Only you. So, at the end of the day, when you lay your head down on that pillow, you should be proud of the man you are because you’ve done your best and given your all to everyone you meet, no matter the outcome.”
“I only see pain and death whenever I lay my head down.”
“That’s why I’m here.” She runs her fingers through my hair. “I’m going to help keep your demons at bay so you can get some rest.”
I pull back and look into her dark eyes, concern and pain swirling around her irises like a storm. “You hate hospitals. You didn’t have to be here.”
“When Leo told me you’d been hurt, it wasn’t even a thought in my mind. I had to be here with you.”
I shake my head. “You might not feel like a phoenix, but I’m starting to think you’remyphoenix.”
She smiles—a real, true, genuine smile. “I told you: I’ve got your six.”
I pull her head down to my chest, and she snuggles her warm body against me.
“And I’ve got yours.”
“James Theodore Russo, get that perfectly round ass back in bed.”
I freeze with one foot on the floor. “Who told you my middle name?”
“Your father.”
“Of course he did.” I shake my head. “It’s been two days. I don’t want to lie in bed anymore.”
Phoenix lifts my leg and tucks it back under the comforter. “I don’t care what you want.”
I grunt. “Some bedside manner. Do you have another nurse on duty today?”
She smirks. “Yeah, his name is Leo. Want me to get him?”
