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“How did you get in?” I demanded.
“A very accommodating delivery man,” Kenny said.
“Great. Now get the fuck out.”
“I need to talk, please.”
I had never heard him beg like that. All signs of fronting were gone completely. He looked so pathetic that I relented, even though I had no feelings for him left anymore – other than pity, I supposed – and I had recently realized that perhaps I never really had.
“Okay, fine,” I said, stepping out of the way, “but no funny business. Touch me and my boyfriend will throw you out a window.”
“I thought he was your fiancé.”
Oops.
“Semantics. What do you want?”
“I just needed to come tell you that it was a hug mistake, cheating on you with Raquel.”
“No shit, Sherlock.”
“No, I mean it. We really aren’t working at all. She changed completely after we got engaged. I was hoping you might take me back. I’ve never been happier than when I was with you,” he sobbed.
“Not a chance, though I’m quite glad to hear that you’re miserable,” I said.
Kenny went to the fridge and opened a bottle of beer without asking. I was about to bring up this fact when he explained himself.
“Sorry, but I need this after the day I’ve had. This is really good, actually.”
“It’s Darcy’s,” I said, coldly.
“I thought his name was Gavin.”
“It is. Darcy is my roommate; she’s a girl.”
“Oh, going both ways, hey?”
“Kenny!”
“Shit, sorry, just a joke. Anyway, I found out that Raquel was cheating on me with a guy from the new job she started at a tanning salon.”
“None of that sentence surprises me and you shouldn’t be surprised, either. You shouldn’t think you can come to my place and get a beer. I don’t want you here and I’m sick of guys using me,” I blurted out in frustration.
“What is that supposed to mean?” he asked. “Guys? Who else has used you? Gavin? Is there trouble in paradise.”
“No. No one else,” I told him quickly, wanting to kick myself for being so rash and having such a big mouth. “You. You used me and I’m sick of it.”
“Look, I already said I was sorry,” he said, shrugging. “Can’t we just forget about this?”
I grunted and rolled my eyes, not even caring if he saw how agitated he was making me.
How many times did I have to go over this with him?
Fate was cruel, to have brought him back into my life on the same day that I had just decided Gavin needed to be out of it. I didn’t want Kenny back in it and I sure as how didn’t need this complication when I was already feeling so down about Gavin.
Chapter Fourteen
Gavin
It was far from a sure thing, but I was confident. The casting director was the same one who had put me on the series, so I knew she liked what I could do and had a firm grip on the obvious. Which is more than could be said for most of them that I had met.
The only issue was the subject matter. The character was supposed to be struggling with drug addiction. Something I should have known well enough about because of my history with my dad, but it wasn’t really something I liked to think about, let alone mine for dramatic effect.
Still though, at the end of the audition, I was pretty sure that I’d done fairly well. At least well enough to be in the running. It was a short part on a drama but would give me something to do when shooting wrapped on the first season of the series.
“Come with me,” the director said, in a tone impossible to read.
She took me out into the hall, which meant it was either really good or really bad. Either way, it should be over soon.
“I think we both know that you can do better than that,” she said.
“I-”
“You don’t know how close I am to giving you this role, but I can’t, unless you can nail that monologue. Right now, you sound like you’re doing a commercial for a sedative.”
“Yeah, sorry. I just wasn’t able to connect as well as I thought I should have…”
“Go home and think about it. Because you know as well as I know that without that ability to connect, you won’t be convincing at the role. See if you can get over whatever block you have and bring some emotion to it and then come back and try again. I can hold off on making a decision for a couple days.”
I put on my snazzy leather jacket that I never felt quite right in and headed for the exit. Maybe Maggie was right. I really did need to work through my past and maybe therapy could help. I really hadn’t done myself may favors keeping all my feelings stuffed inside and self-medicating with alcohol.
