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Chapter 11 - Dorian
When my eyes opened, I noticed two things, I'd slept without waking from a nightmare, and the second and more important thing was Marian. She was sleeping soundly beside me.
She was lying on her back, her naked body exposed to the light streaming through the window. I turned on my side to stare at her, watching her chest rise and fall. I couldn’t sleep without having a nightmare, even if it was a nap but sleeping beside her had cured that.
That was all it took for her to change so much in one night. Perhaps she was right. I'd been torturing myself and causing my nightmares. Last night I tasted my past and the happiness she'd brought me, and I needed more.
More of her.
I'd told myself I would stay away from her, but opening up to her at the supermarket, facing her kindness, I couldn't hold my desires back.
I missed her so much. I missed talking to her and being in her space. I missed sharing moments with her I’d share with no one else.
Marian had been the first and only woman that saw me as I was, not open but willing to be, and she never pushed. She gave herself freely, was herself completely, and I learned to be the same. I fell for her hard, harder than I’d expected to. I wasn’t friendly because I wanted the people I allowed in my life to be worth being there. She was worth it, worth everything.
I'd thought I imagined her scent last night until I heard her racing heartbeat outside.
What I'd done to her was wrong, cold, and heartless, and she had to live with that cruelty while I had to live with the guilt of what I’d done. I’d done it to protect her, but regardless, that didn't make the pain she'd felt less. It didn't make the agony I forced upon myself any less. I longed for her, dreamt of her, checked on her in secret because I could never let her go, not entirely.
After what happened and deciding to retire, a part of me, although I expected hatred on her part, was happy to return to Wolfcreek because I’d be near her again. I wouldn’t be returning to things as it was, I knew that, but I'd spent my time in the world doing what I set out to and wanted peace.
I told myself to stay away from her, to not disrupt the life she’d created for herself but staying away was out of the question with that vampire hanging around.
He wasn’t the only factor, though. I'd thought it would be easy keeping my distance. I'd done it for years, but the truth was, I was forced to do it for years. Now, nothing was holding me back from her.
No, something was, I thought when she turned in her sleep, and a few curls fell over her face. It was up to her to accept me in her life or not. I'd honor that wish if she wanted nothing to do with me.
Her happiness was always my priority, and if I was getting in the way of that happiness, I'd stay away as much as it would hurt.
I shook my head. That was a lie. I'd try to stay away but fail, just like I already had.
She'd said she was done with me in the woods, then again when she stopped by the house. I'd heard her loud and clear, but that vampire being around kept forcing me into her space. I hated the thought of him being around her.
I’d heard about their little lunch date and what happened as well. His little display of humanity changed nothing. In my eyes, he was a dark creature, but there was nothing I could do to keep her away from him.
I’d thought I’d lost my chance to rekindle our relationship, and then last night, I had to tell her the truth, or I'd lose what hope I had for being friends. I'd thought the truth wasn't necessary after all these years, but it was.
I hadn’t expected her visit would take us here, to this moment, in bed together. I’d thought of this moment so many times I didn’t want to move an inch to wake her. I’d found comfort in my imagination because I told myself she’d never let me close again but here we were.
Last night was another reminder of the great person Marian was and also how much she was like Jasmine. Jasmine had been just as kind but also too trusting. I could have hurt Marian last night; instead, she was concerned if I was okay.
Reaching out, I moved a curl away from her face.
I had a lot to make up for, but I was going to do everything for her to forgive me. Last night was only the start of me showing her what she meant to me, what she'd always meant to me, so when I took a breath and picked up on Killian's scent, I got out of bed. I left the room quickly but quietly and pulled on sweatpants while making my way to the door.
I opened it before he could ring the doorbell, and right away, I knew something was wrong from his tense posture.
“There’s a problem,” he whispered, and his eyes traveled past me and into the house. He could no doubt smell Marian on me and hear her heartbeat upstairs. “She’s sleeping?”
I nodded.
"Good. A body was found in the woods an hour ago," he continued.
“Human?” I questioned, a feeling of adrenaline being triggered that I knew all too well, and he shook his head.
"A dead deer, but all its blood was drained, all of it.”
My fists clenched, and Isaac's face surfaced in my mind. Vampires weren't the only dark creatures that drained their victims, but I could tell Killian was thinking the same thing as me or was thinking of the most likely suspect. I’d known Isaac was terrible news, but I couldn't see Marian taking this well.
