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He snorted. “Yeah—took an arrow to the knee.”
“Someone shot you with an arrow in your living room?”
“No.” He looked at me as if I was the nutty one. “It’s a joke. There’s this old guy in the game and—never mind. You wouldn’t appreciate the meme. You’re kind of a Debbie Downer, aren’t you?”
“I meant, were you bleeding for real.”
“Could be. You think that did it?”
“Partly, yes. And a wish to escape your old life.”
“I had that. Stupid. This place is worse. And now I’ve really fucked myself over.”
“Not necessarily, Walt.”
He snorted and stuffed a cupcake into his mouth, pointing a pudgy finger at me while he choked it down. “Easy for you to say Miss Fancy Schmancy Sorceress. You have them all eating out of the palm of your hand. It took me all day just to wish up this recliner and that was with my staff. Now you have that too.”
“That staff wasn’t good for you, Walt. Trust me.” I yanked the cocoa hose out of his hand. “And quit drinking out of silver. Are you an idiot? You know silver stops magic and you’re drinking a hot, corrosive fluid out of it? Also, you live on top of dragons. No wonder you’ve barely got any magic left. You’re amazing at quenching magic, so I think that if you simply get away from all these dampening influences and get some training, you’ll be fine.”
“You think so?” His beady eyes grew moist with longing. “Can I get the training you got?”
I nearly choked. “Believe me, Walt—you donotwant that.”
“Well, if it sucks, that would be a good punishment. You know, for kidnapping, attempted murder, pain and suffering, all that. It would be like rehab.”
“Rehab from hell.”
“Keeping it all to yourself, huh? That’s not fair.”
“Look. The things I went through I wouldn’t wish on my worst enemy, much less on you. You have no idea what you’re asking for.”
He thrust his lip out mulishly, reached for the cocoa hose and stopped himself. “Well, my life is pretty damn shitty. I just sit here day after day and get fatter. No chick will ever want me and now you say I can’t even learn what you did. Poorly played, Gwynnie.”
I studied my hands, how even now I’d taken refuge in holding my wrist. “There must be other ways. I’ll find out for you.”
“Don’t trouble yourself. I’ll get Fafnir to send me there, for my sentence.”
“If I think you’re going to do that,Iwill sentence you to life imprisonment in this castle, for your own damn good.”
“That’s just cruel.”
“No—what’s cruel is what they’d do to you. It nearly killed me, Walt.”
“But you survived,” he pointed out. “Now you’re stronger than anyone. I’ll find a way to get there.”
Marquise and Scourge would have a field day with him. It would be turning a puppy over to a pair of bored and hungry lions.
“You have to negotiate terms if you do that. Good terms. Absolutely no loopholes.”
“You do it. Sentence me and negotiate the terms.”
“I can’t do that to you.”
“Then I’ll go on my own.” He watched me cannily, clearly perceiving I wouldn’t let that happen. “You’re a softie, Gwynnie. You won’t lock me up here and you won’t let me get taken in a bad deal.”
“I’ll think about it.”
“You’ll do it,” Walt called after me. “You know you want to.”
