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“House Sammael was already our enemy.This is just one more offense to add to their ledger.”
“They better not be our enemy, because we cannot stand against their might.And now you’ve baited them for no better reason than, what,sympathy?”She sneered the word.
His eyes and expression hardened.“Han and Iliana are human beings, Nic, not property.And they are people being hunted for the ‘crime’ of daring to choose who they love and what kind of life they want to have.I’d think thatyou, of all people, would understand and, yes,sympathizewith that.”
“Well, you would be wrong,” she hissed.“I have zero sympathy for fools.And idealists.”
“If we turn them away,” he persisted, “they could die out there, or worse.They don’t know the dangers of our wetlands—which, I might point out, you don’t either.”
“You’re right, I don’t,” she snapped, “but what Idoknow is the Convocation and the serious consequences those two face for running away like that.Worse, they’re like the dog that encounters a bear and comes running to you for safety—with a raging grizzly on its tail.The Convocation will unleash fury like you’ve never seen on House Phel when they discover this.That’s if House Sammael doesn’t destroy us first—andtake Han and Iliana anyway.”
“Let them try,” he snapped.“No society should allow spoiled teenagers to weaponize social status to the extent that they can ruin people’s lives.”
“Teenagers specialize in weaponizing social status to ruin people’s lives,” she retorted.“It’s all a matter of scale.”
“Don’t minimize this as a matter of scale,” he said, warning in his tone.
“Fine.I won’t.Just let me point out—as the person you specifically sought out to help you navigate the social web that is the Convocation—that we are stacking up more houses, very powerful ones, as enemies of House Phel, than we are allies.”
“So be it,” he nearly growled.“I wouldn’t have them as allies.”
“Are you sure?Because you cannot dismiss an entire house, which may consist of thousands of people, based only on the behavior of a few individuals.This year’s head of house may be gone next year, and might become your much-needed ally.You think you can defy the entire Convocation and win, because you haven’t been crushed yet, but that only means the forces are marshalling outside of your awareness.It could be that by the time you are aware, it will be too late.”
“I am not afraid of the Convocation,” he gritted out.“Or Sammael.”
“You should be!”
“They all are tyrants perpetuating a destructive society that ruthlessly suppresses the rights of human beings!”he roared back.“I refuse to humbly bow to their oppression, or worse, become exactly like them by enforcing their corrupt laws because I’m too afraid to stand up for what’s right.”
“Then you’re the biggest fool of all,” she shouted back, fists clenched in impotent rage, wanting to beat them against his chest and knowing it would be like hurling herself against a wall.“Because they willcrushyou.And you don’t understand: This is allmyfault!Because of me, all of these people will suffer and maybe die.My friend Iliana, who never hurt anyone, my sister, the people we’ve gathered here, your parents, your sister,you.”By the time she got to the last word, she practically choked on it, a sob escaping with it.
She tried to grab it back.Tried to catch her breath and couldn’t.She burst into a torrent of tears.
“Oh, my heart,” Gabriel said, reaching her in one stride and sweeping her into his arms.He carried her over to a low wall and sat, cuddling her against him.“Don’t do this to yourself.None of any of this is your fault.”
“It is,” she insisted through her tears.“You heard them.They learned about me escaping, so they thought they could do it, too.If I hadn’t been so irresponsible, if I’d simply sucked it up and performed my duty as I’d been trained to do, then they, you, your family, would all be safe.Instead, I’ve brought—” With horror she realizedshewas the dog leading a raging grizzly to ravage everyone and everything she cared about.
He stopped her words with a kiss, cupping the back of her head with one big hand and kissing her breathless.Which didn’t take much, as the flood of tears had already nearly drowned her.Still holding her close, Gabriel showered kisses over her face, murmuring soothing words, embracing her with ferocity, as if she were the fragile seedling now and he could somehow shelter her from any storm that came their way.She knew he couldn’t—especially against the might of the Convocation and cruel House Sammael—but, perversely, in that moment, it felt as if he could.As if, if she stayed like this forever, everything would be fine.
“None of this is your fault,” he murmured, and she realized he’d been repeating that same phrase, patiently wearing her down until she heard and understood.And, of course, he believed that, but he believed all sorts of noble things that simply weren’t true.
“You’re wrong,” she gasped, still out of breath from the fury, the grief, and his kisses.“I kicked over a lantern out of a fit of pique and set the world on fire.”
He laughed a little, then pulled back to study her face, wiping away her tears with his thumbs.“Everyone has a breaking point.Have you ever considered that you are a hero?You dared to imagine a better life for yourself than the cage they tried to cram you into, and because you had that courage, others are now seeing a way to do the same.”
“No,” she answered, miserable and embarrassed and horrified at once.“I was selfish.I ran because I was afraid.And now I’ve perhaps permanently harmed Maman, jeopardized Alise’s future, and will likely destroy you and your house along with it.You should despise me.”Her heart throbbed with the cold knowledge—and the bone-deep awareness of how much she’d come to depend on his love.She couldn’t live if he came to hate her.
“And yet I love you,” he replied, kissing her, drawing her into a deeper, sweeter caress of lips.“I find you incredibly admirable, and so do your sister and your friends.I saw the way they looked at you with hope, believing that you can help them.”
“Wait until you see their faces when they discover the truth—that I can’t do anything for them.”
“You already did.You gave them safe haven.”
She laughed bitterly.“No,youdid that, oblivious to the fact that I was trying to protect you and House Phel.”
“I wasn’t oblivious.”He produced an angelic smile.“I simply ignored you and did what I knew you’d want if you hadn’t been afraid in the moment.”
“I’mstillafraid.And my course of action was the smart one, the practical choice.”
