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Meadow
SHADE AND I STOODhand in hand, both of us staring as the casket was lowered into the grave. I had never lost someone. My grandfather passed away a couple of years ago but other than that, I had never experienced this sort of loss. This pain that felt like someone was stabbing me constantly with a knife. It ripped into my heart, turned and twisted until all I felt was agony shredding my damn soul.
Members of Hell’s Harlem from all over had shown up to the funeral. They offered their condolences, the air around them thick and tense. While they offered their gentle words to me, they told Shade they would help him avenge Sunny. He would only nod or grunt in response but never took his hand from mine.
Our friends and family had been beyond supportive. My brother apologized. I could sense the guilt resting on him, weighing him down constantly when really, this had nothing to do with him. He was just in the wrong place at the wrong time. Everyone offered their condolences but never asked us how we were doing. Why would they? It was obvious how we were doing. We were hurting. But it was harder for Shade. Not that our pain could be compared to one another, but he had been with Sunny longer than I had.
Shade tugged my hand.
I looked up at him.
He gave me a small smile.
My heart stuttered. Maybe we could get through this. One day at a time. One step at a time. As long as we had each other, we could get through anything. It was as if I could hear Sunny whispering those words to me himself.
We hadn’t told anyone that I was pregnant. We wanted to spend some time, keeping that piece of information to ourselves. At least for a little bit.
After Sunny was buried, I gave Shade some time alone with him and went up to my parents.
My mother’s head turned around, her gaze catching mine. Her face softened.
I rushed up to her and threw my arms around her middle.
“Oh, baby.” She enveloped me in a hug, kissing the top of my head. “I’m so sorry.”
Dad hugged us both, muttering his own condolences.
“I can’t do this,” I finally said, my voice thick.
“Yes.” Dad spun me toward him. “You can.” He cupped my face. “I promise you that you will get through this. Together. It’ll be hard. I’m not going to lie and say it isn’t. But together, you and Shade will heal.”
I nodded, blinking back tears at my dad’s words.
I caught Gigi, Luna, and Piper coming toward us.
Dad released me.
The girls picked up their steps until they reached me. They wrapped me in a group hug, crying along with me.
“I’m so sorry.”
“I can’t imagine what you both are going through.”
“We’re here. Whatever you need.”
I wasn’t sure who was saying what, but I didn’t care. I needed them. My friends. Who I also hoped would one day be Shade’s friends just the same.
“Meadow.”
My head snapped up, finding Aiden and Ashton standing near us. They mirrored each other’s poses with their hands shoved in their pockets. A solemn look was on both of their faces.
I released the girls and went up to the twins.
“I’m sorry.” Aiden wrapped me up in a tight hug. He gave me one final squeeze before gently pushing me into his brother’s arms.
Ashton’s hug lasted a little longer than what was deemed appropriate.
“Fucker shouldn’t be touching what belongs to us.”
