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Submission.
Castration.
As I watched Ainsley’s fingers and hands move over words that would forever taint her soul, it took everything in me not to wrap her up in my arms and tuck her safely in my hold. I wanted to protect her from the terrors of the world. I wanted to keep her safe. I wanted her to be mine. In every sense of the damn word.
When she was done, I learned that she had been kidnapped on the way to her favorite café when she was twenty, only to be rescued five years later. She was partially castrated at the same time to prevent her from being sexually aroused. It didn’t make sense, but it was what happened.
Leaving the bed, I turned off the light and took a breath. I knew she had past trauma, but I never knew just how bad it was. No wonder she didn’t speak anymore.
When I joined her back on the bed, I leaned against the headboard and held out my arms. “Come here.”
She searched my face, probably waiting for me to bolt but I wouldn’t. She never had to worry about that.
“Please, Ainsley,” I said gently.
She tentatively slipped into my arms and straddled my lap.
I pulled the blankets up and over us, her scars now hidden by the shadows. I grazed the back of my hand from the spot between her breasts, down to her belly button.
Her breath caught.
“I’m sorry for what you went through, pet, but I want you to know that I am honored you shared that bit of yourself with me. I could go on to tell you how much I hope those people who hurt all of you suffer, but I won’t. Iwilltell you that I will do what I can to show you a gentle touch. To show you that not all men are evil. If I have to spend the rest of my life waiting for you to give me every piece of yourself, I will. Because I know that when I have you in your entirety, it will be the greatest gift I have ever received.”
Ainsley placed her hands on my shoulders, her gaze burning into mine.
The sun was just starting to come up, but the room was still dark enough that I could only see a silhouette of her.
I could see the tears on her cheeks. I sat up, pulling her closer. I brushed my thumb along her cheek, wiping away the tears.
I slipped my other hand up her inner thigh and when I reached her center, a growl left me at the sudden wetness coating the tips.
She trembled against me, her nails digging into my shoulders and waited.
I wasn’t sure how much she could feel but as I slipped a finger into her body, a soft sigh left her. Her head fell back, exposing her slender throat.
Moving my hand from her cheek to her hair, I fisted the long locks and licked up the length of her throat, all the while pumping my other hand against her.
She whimpered, squeezing her fingers into my shoulders. She rocked her hips back and forth, clearly hinting for more. But I wouldn’t. Not yet. Not completely. Not when she’d just told me things I was sure she’d never told anyone outside of a therapist, if that. She was too emotionally raw, but I wanted to give her a little something in return.
Pulling my finger out of her, I slowly inserted a second one, reveling in the way she arched into my touch.
Her nails dug into my muscles even more, her hips rocked harder against me and sounds of pleasure left her lips. She moaned, whimpered, damn near cried for a release.
My dick throbbed, thankful that she could feel something.
Sliding my mouth up to her ear, I gave the lobe a gentle bite. “Whenever you’re ready, I want you to come all over my fingers, baby.”
She turned her head, her mouth meeting mine.
“Can you do that for me?” I murmured against her lips.
She nodded, a low moan leaving her.
“Good girl.” I fisted her hair and deepened the kiss, pumping my hand harder against her center.
She cried out.
Before she could come like I knew she wanted to, I quickly inserted a third finger into her.
