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We had come back to my place after breakfast and spent the day together.
When I reached the kitchen, I opened the fridge.
I could do this. I could date Sammy and not compare him to Aaron. I could trust that he wouldn’t hurt me. Not unless I asked for it. And it wouldn’t be him actually hurting me but mixing some pain in with my pleasure that I knew we would both enjoy.
The night before at the motel had been one of the best nights of my life. Hell, any night with Sammy was the best. It was like each moment with him topped the time before. I didn’t know how he did it, but he kept it interesting, exciting and fresh.
It was now late the next night. I didn’t have to work because one of the girls wanted to pick up a shift to make some extra money since her car broke down. While I needed the money too, I had agreed since Sammy wanted to hang out anyway. Truth was, he wanted to fuck. Hard. My body still burned from the rough way he was with me as soon as we got back to my apartment. The door hadn’t even been closed all the way before he was back inside of me.
I shivered at the memory, thankful it took over and forced the nightmare that was my late husband out of my mind.
“I thought you were grabbing drinks.”
I jumped, slamming the fridge door shut and backing up into the corner between it and the wall. “I...I’m sorry. I just...I’m...”
“Amber.” Sammy reached out for me, but I cowered into myself.
I hugged my arms around my middle, not used to these feelings rushing through me. They conjured up memories from the past and I didn’t know why.
Sammy’s brows narrowed but he backed off. “What’s going on?”
I took a deep breath and then another before finally meeting his dark eyes. “Talking about BDSM earlier suddenly triggered a memory that I didn’t like.”
“Shit.” He backed up, running his hand over his nape. “I didn’t know. I’m sorry.”
“No, please.” I went up to him and placed my hands on his chest. “I didn’t know either. I’ve read BDSM type stories and have done research. We talked about it earlier today and I was fine but suddenly, for whatever reason, when I came into the kitchen just now, this memory...”
“It wasn’t a good one obviously.” Sammy covered my hand, bringing it up to his mouth and placing soft pecks on my knuckles.
“No, it wasn’t.” My heart thumped, my stomach somersaulting as I tried getting the words out. “My husband raped me.”
Sammy
I wanted to killthe fucker who hurt Amber. No, who raped her. Her husband. Someone she trusted. Someone she gave her life to. As I listened to her tell me part of her story, the rage only grew inside of me. Her soft words broke my heart.
“I mentioned to him how I wanted to spice up our sex life. BDSM has always fascinated me, and I wanted to implement it into our marriage. I thought I trusted him enough to do that, but I was wrong. I asked him about it and it made him mad,” she told me, wringing her hands in her lap.
We were sitting back on the couch. She was hugging a pillow and averting my gaze.
As much as I wanted to replace that pillow with me, I didn’t. I would console her when she was ready, but until then I would listen to her speak her truths.
“After that, I never mentioned it to him again,” she continued. “Then I met you and you and I have talked about it briefly, but you told me right away to choose a safeword. You asked me what I didn’t like. There’s been more communication between us in the short time we’ve been sleeping together than all the years I was married to Aaron. But I guess talking about it today made me think of him. I don’t know. But that’s what happened.”
“Can I touch you?” I asked her gently, needing her in my arms. Aftercare was important. Even if it was just after a heavy conversation. You didn’t need to have sex in order to be taken care of afterwards.
Her head snapped up, her eyes, sad and vacant, locking with mine. She nodded, probably not expecting me to ask for permission.
I inched closer to her, wrapping my hands in her hair and messing up her ponytail. Placing a soft peck on her forehead, I hoped she could feel what I was feeling. Although I didn’t know how I felt, I knew that I liked her and cared for her, and I wanted to burn the mother fucking world down to avenge her. Aaron may have been dead and gone, but there was something else too. Other shit happened to her she wasn’t telling me. She would. In time. But I needed to first earn her trust, just like she needed to earn mine. It worked both ways.
“I’m sorry that happened to you, pet.” I leaned my forehead against hers. “I can be sadistic. I don’t need to inflict pain to get off, but it definitely heightens my pleasure. My favorite kink is degradation. I enjoy when I’m deep inside you with my hands around your throat as I call you names. When you didn’t mention anything about not liking it, I took a chance and showed you a bit of what I like.” I kissed her nose, taking a moment to just feel her in my arms.
“How did you know that I would like being slapped?” she asked softly.
“I didn’t but you also didn’t say that it was a hard limit. When I slapped your cheek and you moaned, I knew. Fuck, baby, I knew.”
She lifted her head. “What did you know?”
I gave her a small smile. “I met my match.”
