Page 25 of Bundle of Joy


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“Yeah, it’s when you want a witness to appear but they don’t want to, or something. You make them show up so they can back you up and say what happened,” she says.

“I mean, I know what a subpoena is, more or less, but what do you want me to say about what happened?”

“Are you kidding?” she asks, her mouth hanging open as if I just told her that a comet crashed into earth and we’re spinning in the opposite direction now. “That awful place fired me simply because some asshole complained that I wasn’t nice enough to his snot-nosed kid. That kid was the one who spilled apple juice all over me, basically attacking me first. All I did was try to put him in his place, which his rich, shitty excuse of a father should have been doing all along.”

I don’t like anything she’s saying but I try not to get too offended by the insulting words she’s calling Daniel and Charlie so that I can focus on the other big picture stuff she’s telling me and try to understand what’s going on.

“What do you mean, some asshole complained?” I ask her. “Who complained?”

“That guy with the kid who was having the big party and the big crazy cake,” she says.

I just look at her, blinking, wanting to ask how she knows and for more information but not wanting to give it away that I’ve been sleeping with said guy.

“You do know why we got fired, right?” she asks me.

“I mean, yeah, they said that we were inappropriate and rude to that guy,” I tell her. “And we were. But I didn’t know that there were complaints made.”

“So, you thought that, what, Matt or someone snitched on us?” she asks, now looking as confused as I’ve been.

“Well, yeah, something like that,” I think.

Or that you were trying to get me in trouble to save yourself.

“Look, Matt wouldn’t do that. He left because of how they fired us like that. So did practically everyone who worked there.”

“Really?” I ask, feeling rather touched.

“Yeah. I don’t think any of them would have turned us in. When that bitch from HR called me, she said the exact words that we used. Silver spoon and all that stuff…”

“Yeah, she said that to me too,” I say.

“So, what exactly did you think happened? Obviously that asshole complained about us and got us fired. That makes a lot more sense than Matt or another of our friends from there running to snitch on us, you know?”

“True,” I say, gulping and trying not to let her notice.

“Why are you acting like you’re so surprised?” she asks.

I’ve never liked Michelle’s blunt attitude and I think she was way too blunt with the customers that day in particular, but she is making a whole lot of sense right now. And she is looking at me like she’s genuinely confused instead of trying to start trouble.

Did Daniel get me fired because he wanted to make it so that I had to work for him?

It sure does look that way.

“I just… I had never considered the exact circumstances of how we got fired,” I tell her, since she’s still looking at me like she’s waiting for an answer to her question.

“Well, I hope you put the pieces together in time to testify for my lawsuit,” she says. “And maybe you should bring one of your own too, because it’s just wrong for them to so quickly dispose of their staff all because we were bending over backwards to do what the rich customers wanted and that still wasn’t good enough for them. Maybe we should sue the customer too. Don’t you think it’s vindictive for him to have called and gotten us fired like that?”

I open my mouth but just then she looks up, behind me, and says, “Oh, for fuck’s sake. Of course.”

I look back and see that Daniel and Charlie have come to check on me.

“This makes perfect sense now,” Michelle says, shaking her head in disgust. “No wonder you never put two and two together. You haven’t been thinking with your head at all.”

She walks away from me just as Daniel and Charlie get close to me.

“Is everything alright?” Daniel asks. “Who was that?”

I just look at him. It’s clear he doesn’t even remember her.

“I have to go,” I say suddenly.

“What?” he asks.

“Catharine, no, don’t go!” Charlie says.

“I’m sorry, but I have to.”

“See?” Daniel says, getting mad now. “This is exactly why I was afraid to let… this… happen when Charlie…”

He drifts off, obviously not wanting to say it in front of Charlie. He didn’t want to make me official because he was afraid it wouldn’t work out and hurt Charlie. But now it’s not working out because he went and got me fired, forcing me to have to work for him, and that’s no way to begin a “relationship,” or whatever this is. So, we’re even, I guess.

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