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One
It feels like I’ve known Jack my whole life. We first met on the playground at school on my first day of kindergarten. I was sitting on the swings, still struggling with that legs-forward-then-kick-back thing to get myself moving – I was mostly just kicking off the wood chips that made up the playground. Next thing I know, three first grade boys came up to me and told me to move.
I’ve never liked being told what to do – I think it comes from having two obnoxious older brothers, but who really knows. Basically, I told them they could have their pick of the other ten open swings, but they kept hassling me. They started jostling the swing’s handles attempting to throw me off.
Clinging to them with all my might, I didn’t notice anyone join us until I heard a boy shout at my bullies. The boys parted, and that’s when I first laid eyes on Jack Fuller. He was cute even then, not that I was really paying attention at that point. Boys still had cooties as far as I was concerned.
My bullies didn’t like that someone came along to spoil their fun, and they ended up pushing Jack down. He got back up and punched the biggest one in the face. The boy - I can’t remember his name now to save my life - burst into tears, and then the whole group ran away. Jack watched them carefully before he walked up to me, his cute little face frowning, looking at me closely.
“Are you okay?” he asked.
“Yeah,” I said. “Thanks.”
He proceeded to sit in the swing next to me and then spent the remainder of recess teaching me how to properly use my legs to gain momentum. At the end of recess, he told me that I was his friend now, and he’d always protect me. I thought he was just being nice, but it’s been over 10 years since that day, and he’s still my best friend.
Today is the first day of our sophomore year at Forrester Park High School. I haven’t seen Jack all summer, since he’s been at an intensive football camp that only finished a week ago. He’s a crazy good quarterback, and already has scouts from several universities looking at him. I’m beyond proud of him since I know that he wants nothing more than to go pro.
Not seeing him this summer turned out to be harder than I ever imagined. It’s the first summer we’ve gone without seeing each other since we were five years old. We tried to talk on the phone at night when he had some time, but he was usually pretty tired.
After spending the last ten years talking or seeing him nearly every day, it feels unnatural not to talk regularly. I’ve missed him so much, but our separation has also made me realize something that I think I’ve been ignoring for a long time.
I’m in love with my best friend.
I’ve always liked Jack, but it’s only been in the past year or so where I’ve reallynoticedhim. Actually, that might be a lie. I noticed him in the 7th grade when he kissed me on a field trip. Since he never mentioned it afterward, I thought it must be a fluke. But ever since we entered high school, I can’t help getting distracted by how mesmerizing his dark blue eyes are, or the way his arms look now that he’s been spending more time in the gym trying to bulk up for football.
It’s dangerous feeling this way for your best friend. If I tell him how I feel, it could ruin our friendship. As sure as I am about my feelings, I have no idea if he feels that way for me – or ever could. I’m not about to risk losing my best friend just because I’m in love with him. I’d rather have him as we are than not have him at all.
And yet, I can’t help wondering if he might feel this way, too. Am I missing out on something wonderful because I’m too scared to take a risk?
My heart speeds up a little at the idea that he could love me back.
It drops to my stomach when I think about what would happen if he rejected me – politely, of course, because it’s Jack and he’s always nice to me – but still wanted to be friends. I’m not sure I could handle that. The thought of watching Jack date other girls makes me want to vomit.
I need to stop thinking about this. There are too many possibilities, and I’m overanalyzing.
I don’t have time for this. Jack’s picking me up in 10 minutes to drive me to school, and I’m practically giddy with excitement at the thought of finally being reunited with him. It took me forever to figure out what outfit to wear, but I eventually settled on a cute, deep red summer dress with cap sleeves. It accentuates my figure, just like the magazines suggest I should wear to get a boy’s attention. I also put on makeup, using the colors the girl at Sephora advised to bring out my brown eyes. My dark brown hair lies in loose curls just past my shoulders.
I hear the doorbell ring just as I finish applying my lip-gloss.
“I got it!” I yell as I grab my backpack and run down the stairs.
I swing open the door and my eyes widen as I take in the sight before me.
Holy shit.
Jack got way hot. His brown hair is cut short on the sides and left a little longer on the top. His deep blue eyes widen like mine as he takes me in. My heart is racing as I watch him peruse my body in a way heneverhas before. He finally makes eye contact with me and smiles wide.
“Wow, Paige. You look great!”
He steps into the house and gives me a tight hug. My heart is slamming against my chest at this point. God, he smells so good. I close my eyes and squeeze him back, relishing in this moment. This is heaven.
He pulls back, “You ready to go?”
“Yep!” I turn around to pull the door closed after we’ve walked out, trying to hide the blush that’s spread over my cheeks. “Bye, mom, see you after school.”
I think she calls back, but I don’t hear her before the door closes, and I follow Jack to his BMW 3-series. Have I mentioned his parents are loaded? Personally, I don’t think a 16-year-old boy needs a brand-new beamer, but since it’s now my ride, too, I guess I can admit that it is pretty cool. He opens the door for me and I slide in. He walks around the front of the car and gets in the driver’s seat. I catch him glancing at my legs as he starts the car, and I can feel the blush on my cheeks deepen.
He clears his throat and slides his sunglasses on. “How was your summer?”
