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So I picked up my cell and typed the number with a shaking hand.
“West,” the voice on the other end growled, and as warmth spread through my chest, I knew I had made the right choice.
* * *
We met at their house–theyhad offered to find a neutral location, a coffee shop or something, but I didn’t know how I would react to their presence again, and I really didn’t want to be in public, in case… in case of what, I wasn’t sure. In case I threw myself at them?
As the rideshare drew up to their home, I understood what the alphabet soup of letters (CEO, CFO, PhD) on their LinkedIn profiles spelled: money. The house was large and modern, all pale concrete and plate glass, and had a high fence surrounding it. I was buzzed through the gate and into an elegant yard, a small, manicured patch of grass (and three lounge chairs) surrounded by sprays of ferns, dense clouds of richly-scented flowers, and small trees. It was like a private park, just for them, and in the center, their house. The lower level was all glass, with the walls folded back so there was hardly any difference between the interior and the garden. I clutched my folder tight to my body: inside were the reports from the hospital doctors and printed copies of the online forms I had filled out on my way to Ardor a week ago, giggling nervously over the questions (anal intercourse: yes / no / maybe). Mortifying, to be sure, but the Alphas and Rian had filled out the same forms: Lucas had said they were members in good standing, at the club, and Gray had confirmed the same on the phone.
“Bring your paperwork, and we’ll compare notes,” he had said, his monotone shooting straight to my core, igniting a small flame where it landed.Compare notes.But what if their paperwork contained something really wild? I thought back on the few things I had ruled out entirely, my palms sweaty against the smooth paper folder. Hopefully Lucas wasn’t, like,reallyinto nipple clamps.
The fear flew from my mind as I saw him: sitting at a long table just inside one of the house’s open windows-slash-doors, a cup of coffee next to his elbow, looking more casual than he had at the club. Softer. Well, no–softer wasn’t the right word for the way his arms pushed against the sleeves of his worn-in cotton tee shirt. It was a greenish gray that set off his tan complexion, and I stared for a moment, drinking in the sight of him. Was he coffee, or rain? The scents at the club had been so muddled, I hadn’t been able to discern who was who, and I now was struck by a need to know, to unlock the intricacies of each man’s unique, particular scent, to know they each smelled when they were sad, or elated, or–or aroused.
Keep yourself together, Madison.
He noticed me, and stood, walking toward me until we were a few feet apart on the expansive patio outside the house.
“Hello, Madison,” he said, and then, “Welcome to our home.”
Ourhome.
He meant his pack.
Not… not me.
Keep telling yourself that, Madison.
He smiled.
CHAPTERTEN
Rian
The four ofus sat in the living room–Gray and I on one couch, Lucas in his usual chair, Madison perching–back straight, feet crossed demurely–in a second chair as if she were at the weirdest ever job interview. She was reading through our paperwork now, skipping quickly over the test results–all clean–and going straight for the good stuff. Lucas had her copy, and I was dying to go to him, to read over his shoulder, to scan for the words that could make all the difference.
Beta involvement: yes / no / maybe.
Omegas didn’t like to share. Not with each other, certainly, and not with a beta. Not with me.
What else was there? I couldn’t remember. The forms were standard, the same ones you would get at a heat clinic or hospital, and more concerned with legal entanglements than romantic ones. I was thankful that the club handled this aspect of meeting potential pack members–or, in this case, heat partners–but it didn’t make for the most exciting reading material. I had filled out my own copy carelessly, zipping down the columns circling willy-nilly. We weren’t going to get selected by anyone, anyway, so what did it matter.
But now…
“This all seems to be in order,” Lucas said, sounding for all the world like the professor he was, at least part-time. “I’ll give you some more time, I know there are more of us,” he continued, as Madison glanced wide-eyed up from her stack of documentation. Her eyes flitted from Lucas to Gray and back down to the papers again, missing me entirely.What was that?I tried to catch Lucas’s eye, and was rewarded with a nearly imperceptible nod and smile.Good? Reassuring?I couldn’t read anyone’s scents, but I tried to grope around in our bond for something more than nerves, which was what seemed like the predominant emotion.
“No, I’m–I’m a fast reader,” she said, and blushed. She flipped over one last page, and looked up. “And there’s nothing–uh, I only wanted to check a few things.”
For fuck’s sake. I was dying to snatch the papers from Lucas’s hands, to read over her lists of interests, of hard limits, of preferences.
“Well, then, I guess you’ll want to see the space?” She nodded, blushing furiously. This whole thing couldn’t have been more awkward if we tried. Andun-beta-like.Madison had spent her whole dating life–so what, maybe 7, 8 years?--going on first dates to movies, holding hands, sharing drive-through fries and parking out of sight of parents and cops, dancing at frat parties, and whatever else normal betas did when they liked someone. Now she was here, standing with a navy folder full of doctor’s records in her hands as Lucas ushered her from the living room towards the stairs leading to the first floor bedrooms. Not to mention the exhaustive list of kinks she had just read through–and forthreemen. I could only imagine what Gray had put on his. I rubbed the heels of my hands over my eyes, stalling for time for just a second before I followed them up.
“It’s okay,” Gray said at my shoulder. “If Luc’s showing her the nest, then she’s got potential.”
“And that’s okay?” I said, my voice sounding off even to my own ears.
“Yes,” Gray said, as I turned my head to face him. He was slightly shorter than I was, but I always felt like I was looking up, even so. “You like her. I know you do.” My mouth went dry as I gave a little jerk of my head, remembering the words he’d whispered in my ear last night as he thrust into me, the things I’d said in return. The skin where his bite had marked me tingled. “We’ll be okay. We always have been.”
We had. I gave another little nod and followed Lucas and Madison upstairs.
