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She glances at the open door, then back to me and leans in closer. “He told me you were taken by some gang and were in danger. Is that true?”
I exhale. “He’s the one who caused it all in the first place and the only reason I’m involved is because he got me involved.”
“He gave me some things,” she whispers, her eyes getting a touch wider, “and told me to give them to you.”
I narrow my eyes. “What did he say?”
“He said I had to give to you this package and that you needed to follow the instructions for your own safety. He said to tell you that you weren’t safe with that man you’re with.”
“Where is this package?”
She stands and ruffles through her drawers to return with a yellow manila envelope. She hands it to me, and I take another quick look at the door before opening it. The first thing I pull out is a note.
Willow,
I know I don’t deserve your trust, but I need it right now. You’re in serious danger. You have something they want, and you don’t even know it. I need to see you. They will never stop coming for you. Contact me on the number enclosed as soon as you receive this. Don’t tell Johnny about me. He’s using you to get this information. I know you think he’s back with good intentions, but he isn’t. I made the mistake of telling him you have what he’s looking for, that’s why he came back. I hope you trust me enough to know I did what I did to protect you. Call me as soon as you can.
Dad
I lower the letter, hands trembling. He hasn’t bothered to contact me for years, but he can manage a note when it suits him. And he wants me to trust him? Can I trust him? Can I trust any of them? I’m starting to think I haven’t even scratched the surface of whatever it is that’s going on here. I lower the note and look to my mother, who is staring at me with wide eyes.
“I will deal with this,” I say. “Don’t worry yourself about it anymore.”
“Who is Johnny?”
Of course she read it.
“It doesn’t matter, it’s not safe for you to know anymore.”
“Of course you don’t trust me,” she mutters, crossing her arms, “You’ll never forgive me, will you?”
“You tried to kill me.”
Her eyes narrow. “You don’t understand, I was trying to save you.”
I can’t hear this. Not again.
“I have to go,” I say, standing. “It was nice to see you.”
Sarah enters the room, cutting off her reply.
“It’s time for some afternoon swimming,” She announces.
She’s saving me.
Like she always does.
I stand and shove the envelope into my bag before zipping it up. I hug my mother briefly.
“I’ll talk with you soon.”
“We’re not finished here, Willow,” she warns, eyes locked onto mine.
I look from her to Sarah and back again. “Yes, we are.”
I leave the room and wait for Sarah at the exit. She gives me a sympathetic squeeze on the shoulder, and I hug her once more before leaving and going back to the truck where Jagger is waiting, face expressionless, eyes narrowed. He’s always on alert. Always watching. Always waiting for the next attack.
I wonder what it’s like to live like that.
“You ok?”
He asks the question the moment I’m in the truck.
“I’m fine.”
“Is your mom good?”
“Sure.”
“Don’t believe you,” he mutters.
“I’m fine, Jagger. Seriously.”
I glance out the window as he reverses out of the parking lot. I’m fighting the tears, but mostly, I’m fighting the confusion. Is what my dad said true? Is Jagger only here because he wants whatever it is I apparently have? I don’t want to believe it’s true, but would I be stupid to not even consider it?
I don’t know.
I don’t know anything.
“What the fuck happened in there?” Jagger asks as we drive back towards my house.
“I just don’t like visiting her, Jagger. That’s it.”
“You’re lyin’ to me.”
I don’t look at him.
“Can we just go home?”
He exhales, more frustrated than anything. “Look, I don’t know what’s goin’ on, but you can trust me. You know that, right?”
I look to him now, the envelope burning a hole in my bag. The letter looming in my mind. “Can I?”
He pulls the truck over, turning to face me. “What’s that supposed to mean?”
“If you didn’t need my father so badly, would you have come back?”
He studies me for a moment, his eyes scanning over my face. Then he leans in, gripping my chin. “You know the answer to that. You know I want you. What more do you want me to say?”
“That you’re not just here to get what you want and then you’ll leave...”
He frowns. “You think I’d bother protecting you if that’s all I wanted? I’d let Manchez get hold of you and I’d just get the information from him. I’m protectin’ you because you matter, Willow.”
