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“No.” Dante shook his head. “Ye were protectin’ yourself. I’m sure ye feel more like an O’Shea than an O’Reilly, and not because of your ma either. Your granda was your ma’s father, wasn’t he?”
“Yeah, he was. He didn’t agree with her leavin’ me when she left Daddy, so he was always there for me. He always called me little Miss O’Shea. On me birth cert, me ma put me surname as O’Shea, but everyone called me Ina O’Reilly, even teachers at school. When I left Carlow, I left that name behind.”
“I figured as much.”
I nodded and said nothing further. I knew I had a lot to explain, but part of me didn’t want to tell Dante and not because I didn’t trust him. I didn’t want to tell him because he was my safe place. Daddy and Finn ruined everything they touched. I didn’t want that to happen with Dante.
“This is hard for ye to talk about, isn’t it?”
“Yeah, I wanted to put everythin’ about me past out of me life, but I haven’t been able to.” I looked down at my cup of tea. “Daddy was verbally and physically abusive towards me. It started a while after me granda passed away. He’s an alcoholic, and when he drinks, he turns into a cruel person.”
“Christ,” Dante said. “Baby, I’m so sorry.”
“I ran away from the farm when I came here.” I looked up. “That sounds funny, right? I’m twenty-seven, and I had to run away from home.”
“It’s not funny. It’s brave. Ye put yourself first and left. That’s admirable.”
I nodded, trying to let his words sink in and reassure me.
“Me upbringin’ after me granda died was utterly miserable. I was a slave to Daddy. From the time I was ten, I was takin’ care of the house, cookin’ every meal, washin’ clothes, and anythin’ else ye can think of. When I turned seventeen, I went to the local community college, spent a few years attendin’ there, and got me degree in business. I had to run the farm while I was in college. I wasn’t allowed to have friends or go out for anythin’ fun. Daddy only allowed me to go out with Finn because Finn listened to him. The house I lived in, the life I had, was a prison to me.”
Dante reached for my hand and gripped it tightly in his. He didn’t say a word, he just listened to me, and I felt as if a dam burst inside me because having someone simply listen to what I had to say felt like it took a heavy weight from my shoulders, one I had been carrying around for years.
“I don’t have memories from that house, Dante,” I sniffled. “I have scars, some ye can see and others ye can’t.”
“C’mere, honey.”
Dante tugged me towards him and settled me on his lap. He kissed my face and held me close as I wept.
“I hate cryin’ over Daddy, over Finn too.” I wiped my eyes. “Finn never hit me, but he was emotionally abusive and verbally too. In many ways, he was just like Daddy, and that makes me sick. I can’t believe I allowed meself to be with someone who had the same characteristics as Daddy, the ones that I hated.”
“How worried are ye about him? Your ex?”
“Enough to look over me shoulder,” I admitted ruefully. “He knows where I work, he knows I’m usin’ me mammy’s surname … d’ye think he knows where I live?”
“I don’t know,” Dante answered. “I’m gonna mention it to Martin, our building’s head of security anyway. The Peak’s towers are a fort as it is, but alertin’ the security team to this is a smart move. Have ye got a picture of this ex-boyfriend?”
I shook my head. “I just took what I needed when I left.”
Dante nodded and was quiet for a minute or two. He squeezed me, then kissed my cheek.
“Your da is why ye hate fightin’, and your ex is why ye hate bein’ shouted at,” Dante said. “That’s why ye get scared and freeze up with both, isn’t it?”
I nodded. “I wanted to get away from them, from the life I knew, and be independent. I had to run away. They wouldn’t have let me leave otherwise.”
“Fuckin’ no good bastards, the pair of them.”
I didn’t reply.
“I’m glad ye told me, sweetheart,” he said, lifting my hand to his mouth so he could kiss my fingers. “Ye’ll be okay. I’m gonna take care of ye. No one will hurt ye, I promise.”
I smiled because I believed him.
“I do believe I owe ye a kiss, Mr Collins.”
His eyes darkened. “Ye do,” he agreed. “Gimmie all of your girl germs, gorgeous.”
I leaned forward and bumped the tip of my nose against his. Dante’s minty, hot breath sent a shiver down my spine, and when one hand gripped my thigh and the other latched onto my waist, my body ignited with heat. I clenched my legs together to dull the ache that pulsed away between them. Dante looked down at my thighs, then up at my face, and grinned.
