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Emerson lets go of the plate and jumps backward, her beautiful blue eyes turn wild, glittering with fear and even from a few feet away, I can see her hands are trembling.
She thinks I’m going to hurt her…
“Please don’t look at me like that…” I slur.
“Please leave… just… leave me alone,” she pleads and my heart breaks at her words. That’s what my mom used to tell me. She asked me to leave her alone and I listened to her. Maybe if I hadn’t listened to her and listened to my gut instead, she would still be here, alive.
“I won’t leave you,” I tell her, shaking my head, determination coating my words. “But please don’t look at me like I’m going to hurt you. Please, don’t be scared of me.”
“You’re drunk,” she points out and that wild look in her eyes overtakes her features now. She continues taking small steps backward, retreating farther into the room, farther away from me. I want her close, in my arms, safe, secure. It’s the strangest, but truest emotion I’ve ever felt before.
“Yes… I had something to drink, but that doesn’t change the fact that I would never hurt you. I can control myself,” I sigh and set the plate down on top of the dresser
“You’re scaring me,” she admits, her voice small and shaky. I don’t know who hurt her, but in that moment I vowed to myself to find out. I will find out who did this to her and then I will make them pay. It’s obvious she was powerless, weak, but she’s not anymore. She has me now, and I’ll protect her, defend her till my last breath. I know this without even thinking.
Holding my hands up, with my palms showing, I try to calm her like I would a scared animal. “You don’t have to be scared of me. Not ever,” I assured her. “I just want… I want you to feel safe. You don’t have to be scared here. I promise I’ll keep you safe. No one will hurt you, least of all me.”
There’s a pregnant pause, and I should turn around, walk back down to the basement and find another bottle to drown myself in. I don’t know why I’m trying, maybe I’m a sadist. I’m certain she’s not going to respond at all, she’s too scared, afraid of me, but then she shocks the hell out of me and very quietly says, “okay.”
A smile tugs on my lips at her words and even though she doesn’t smile back, I notice her shoulders relax, and the tightness of her features recede. My gaze sweeps over the freckles that adore the bridge of her nose…my mother used to call them angel kisses. I blink away the feeling residing inside of me. Someday I’m going to make this girl smile, laugh…I’m going to see her eyes light up with joy, with happiness.
Of course my fucking phone decides to start ringing right then, which causes Emerson to jump and return to her high alert mode.
I curse under my breath and make a mental note to keep my phone on silent around her. Fishing my phone out of my pocket, I look down at the screen and curse some more when I see my dad’s name flashing across the screen.
He’s the last person I want to talk to right now, but if I don’t answer, then he’ll assume the worst, not that he’s going to say ‘good job, son,’ or anything else remotely nice.
“I have to answer this,” I tell Emerson, hitting the green answer key before I can decide against it. Averting my eyes to the floor, I bring the phone to my ear.
“Tell me you haven’t fucked up too badly yet?”
“Nope,” I grit out. “Everything is peachy here.”
“Good. I’ll be home tomorrow night. Have you taken her anywhere? Her father is expecting her to make some new friends.”
My eyes dart to Emerson. She doesn’t want to be friends with my friends. They’ll eat her up alive, hurt her, and no way in fucking hell am I letting anyone hurt her again.
“Not yet. I was letting her settle in.” My words slur a bit and I know I’m giving myself away, but what do I care. He already sees me as a disappointment, a disgrace to the Jefferson name.
“Have you been drinking?” My father’s voice turns murderous and before I can answer him, he’s speaking again. “I asked you to do one thing and you couldn’t even do that. Jesus fucking Christ, Clark.”
I roll my eyes knowing a lecture is coming, and I’d rather not deal with that right now. It’ll only make me want to drink more, and I need to sober up if I’m going to help Emerson.
“I’ve got to go…” I growl, letting annoyance shine through my voice before I hang up.
