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“What about you?” I croak.
“I told you, this was all for you. Don’t worry about me. Besides, I already came in the bathroom while thinking about you,” he says without an ounce of shame in his voice.
He thought about me while he masturbated. I guess I’m not all that shocked. I knew we were getting into unknown territory and that a guy like him couldn’t hold off on sex forever, but I didn’t…I guess I didn’t expect him to think about me well doing it. I’m nothing special.
I open my mouth to object, but Clark’s phone starts to ring somewhere next to the bed. Clark doesn’t bat an eyelash though and instead continues looking at me.
“I want to repay you, show you that I can do this…” I trail off. I feel shy even though I did just let him finger me and see me completely naked.
Clark’s eyes gleam with approval, but he shakes his head. “I know you can do it, so it doesn’t matter. You have nothing to prove to me. Next time you can repay me. Today was meant to show you that you still have all the power and that not everyone hurts women.”
For some stupid reason, tears well in my eyes, and I want to hug him, kiss him, tell him how much he means to me, but again his phone starts to ring.
“What the fuck?” he mutters under his breath, gently pulling away from me to find his phone. A second later he’s got the sleek device in his hand, a somber look crosses his face and then he looks over at me. Anger clouds his vision and I wonder what, or better yet who would cause his emotions to waver in such a way.
As if he can hear the question I’m asking, he says, “It’s my dad.”
Grabbing the blanket from the foot of the bed, I drape it over my naked body. I know his dad can’t see me through the phone, but I still somehow feel weird knowing Clark is talking to his father and also looking at my naked body.
I’m covered nearly covered up when Clark answers the phone bringing it to his ear.
“What?” he growls into the speaker. If it wasn’t clear before that he was angry about his father’s phone call, it is when I hear the tone of his voice.
“I don’t want to do any more shit for you.” He squeezes his eyes shut, frustration marring his handsome face. After a pause, he sighs, “Fine, I’ll be there. I’ll ask her but if she says no, then you are going to leave her alone. She doesn’t have to go if she doesn’t want to.”
He hangs up the phone and looks over to where I’m still sitting on his bed. Maybe I should’ve gotten up by now, but I can’t bring myself to leave the bed yet. I want what happened between us to resonate within me for as long as it can. I don’t want to let go of the feelings, of the way it felt to be taken care of, instead of being taken advantage of.
With a grim look, Clark says, “There is this charity event at the clubhouse at the end of the month. Our dads want us to go… I already said I would go, but you don’t have to, you can stay here or hang out with Ava if you want.”
Does he not want me to go? My brow furrows. Maybe he wants to go with someone else?
“You don’t have to take me,” I assure him. “You can take someone else. We don’t have to pretend anymore.”
“Em, you still don’t get it, do you?” He gets into the bed beside me, taking my hand and holding it to his chest over his thundering heartbeat. “I want you. I want you and no one else. We aren’t pretending anymore. This is real.”
There’s a pause and I’m not sure what I should say….
“Go with me, be my plus one, my date, my girlfriend…for real this time.”
I’m sure my eyes are bugging out of my head right now, but I can’t wrap my mind around what he just asked me. Doesn’t he know that I’m broken, that I’ll never be like the other girls he’s dated?
“I don’t know…” I whisper.
Tipping my chin upward with one finger, he stares into my eyes. “Think about it. We have time. You don’t have to decide right now, just know that in my mind, in my heart, you’re already mine.”
And if I wasn’t already falling for him, I am now. The only thing standing in our way…
My secret.
Chapter Thirteen
Clark
The next week passes in a flurry and we fall into a routine. Emerson seems happier and more relaxed every day. Coming out of her shell right before my eyes. I see her smile more and worry less. Her anxiety seemingly held at bay by whatever it is that has been growing between us and I’m grateful for that. Elated to see her overcoming all of her fears.
