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I look up at Grandma Silva, my eyes swimming with tears, not certain I can continue reading. It’s been nearly six months since Malakai left the island. He left shortly after the events at the Palace, sticking around only long enough to ensure Asia and her friends would be taken care of. Three men, Hudson, Bryce and Max had arrived in the early hours the morning after everything went down, a few hours after Malakai left. The men, who I now understand are the billionaire brothers and joint owners of Freed Corporation, came to the gangs’ rescue, armed with lawyers of the very highest calibre.
The police arrived shortly after them, arresting Monk and Grayson Bennett. Monk, for the kidnapping of Pink, and Grayson for the murder of six guards and the King.
Grayson took the fall foreverything.
The Freed brothers paid off the other guards to protect Camden and to corroborate the story we all agreed upon. Grayson sacrificed his freedom to cover for Camden murdering the King, as well as Malakai and Eastern who also killed men that night.
Malakai had wanted to take the fall, had offered himself up as sacrifice, but Grayson had refused, asking him for one last favour: to get Ronnie off the island to somewhere safe before the authorities arrived. He was the only one who could, he was the only person talented enough to sail a boat in a storm that had still raged. Like me, like all of us, Grayson knew that Malakai’s defiance saved us all that night. If Malakai hadn’t done what he did, we would all be dead. I’ve no doubt about that. So, Malakai agreed to Grayson’s request and sailed away from me, from us all. I never got a chance to say goodbye.
“Oh, Connie, love,” Grandma says, her voice trembling as much as my hands are.
She’s watched me fall apart, then slowly put myself back together again these past few months. It’s been hellish, brutal. I’ve worried for him. I’ve stayed up night after night walking down to Broken Shores and looking to the horizon hoping, wishing, for his return. Lola has tried to keep me centred, understanding better than anyone what the loss of Malakai’s absence feels like. The only message we received from him was a little over a week after the events of that night. Malakai contacted Grant asking him to pass on a message to me. Like always it was brief and to the point.
Ronnie is safe. She’s with a couple I trust and will live a happy life. I cannot come back to the island, not whilst the investigation continues. I’m sorry. I’m sorry, Little Siren.
Grant had given me a hug and left me to cry bitter tears. It hurt that Malakai hadn’t contacted me directly. Though I understand why, I do. I was a witness and no doubt he didn’t want to implicate me or himself in any way. Both myself and Grandma had to lie under oath a month ago at Grayson’s hearing. All of the gang had been witnesses too. None of us were happy about the lie we agreed to, and it will forever sit heavy on all our hearts, but we understood why Grayson did what he did. Camden was a victim of the King’s brutality and no one wanted him to spend a life in prison for having the courage to do what many people would never have dared. Now Grayson is starting a life sentence. He wasn’t able to escape his family, but in the end, chose to help others to have the one thing he could never have: freedom.
Monk too was given a long sentence for the kidnapping of Pink and for several counts of rape after multiple girls came forward after his arrest. Just like his father, he hurt many people. At least now he cannot continue the Bennett legacy of crime, murder and violence. The line stops dead with him. Blinking back my tears, I push down those thoughts and continue reading.
This morning I realised something. I realised that it’s time to stop being a fucking coward. I’ve waited long enough to contact you. I’m a bastard, and I want to apologise for the pain you’ve endured because of me. I’m so damn sorry for everything…
But most of all I’m so sorry I couldn’t stay.
For the past couple of months I’ve been hiding out here on Grace Bay Beach, the same place I found this shell all those years ago. I want you to know that I never intended on leaving you the way I did. I wanted to say goodbye this time, but after getting Veronika to a place of safety, I knew it would be difficult to return or even contact you given the circumstances. Grayson took the fall for all of us and I owe him more than I can ever repay. He was always the good guy. One day, I’ll find a way to help him. I swear it.
“I don’t think I can read any more,” I say, my eyes filling with tears that are now falling down my face. Grandma Silva looks at me, her gentle smile encouraging.
“Yes, you can, Connie. You’ve longed to receive word from Malakai. You owe it to yourself to read on. I’m here for you,” she adds, wrapping her arm around my waist, giving me her unwavering support. Wiping at the tears on my cheeks, my eyes absorb his words.
Little Siren, I have many, many faults and a past that is riddled with darkness that I may never be able to shake. You deserve to know all of my secrets. You deserve to know who I truly am before you decide whether I’m the man for you.
When I left the island, I asked Grant to take care of the items in this box with instructions to pass them onto you when the time came. Beneath the conch shell, you’ll find four notebooks filled with all the terrible things I’ve ever done. I’m not a fairytale prince or a knight in shining armour. I’m flawed, damaged, broken in many ways.
So, I’m giving you these notebooks, Little Siren. I’m giving you the ability to see right into my soul.
This is me. This is who I am. In these diaries you will find out everything there is to know about me. God knows I want to be enough for you. I want to be worthy of your love. Maybe one day I will be or maybe after reading these you’ll think differently, and I’ll lose you forever.
Either way, it’s time to stop being afraid.
You see, Little Siren, I’m not afraid of how I feel anymore.
I will wait for as long as you need. Forever, if that’s what it takes.
But the minute I hear your siren’s call, I’ll come home.
Forever yours,
Malakai.
With tears streaming down my face, I lay the note gently on the table and reach inside the box, peeling back another layer of tissue paper to reveal a dark leather notebook. My fingers pass over the soft leather, and I bring the topmost notebook up to my face, drawing in a deep breath and savouring the memories it conjures inside my heart. I glance at Grandma, who is studying me carefully, her eyes moist.
“What should I do?” I ask her. There’s a darkness to Malakai, I’ve known that all along, but do I really, truly, want to know the secrets of his past?
“What is your head telling you to do, Connie?” Grandma asks, urging me to be honest.
“To read the notebooks…”
“And your heart?”
